I’m not too good about updating this monthly, so here are the most popular blogs posts for the first quarter of 2009.

1. What’s all the fuss about sexting?

2. Repairing a wet iPod Touch

3. A Dare for Pastors

4. Medium-sized Church Crisis

5. Vision, goal, and mission statements

Top 5 search terms of the quarter

1. Sexting

2. Wet iPod touch

3. Sexting Pics

4. Goals

5. Sexting pictures

Apparently people like sexting.

Top 5 referrers, thanks!

1. Twitter

2. Stumble Upon

3. Google reader

4. Monday Morning Insight

5. Andrew McGill

I’ve noticed a crazy pattern. Help me understand it.

Cause: A Christian leader will say or blog or tweet or Facebook something over-the-top. Hey, it happens. The way things are these days, an unfiltered moment can easily get recorded.

Effect: Someone calls them on it. Maybe it’s a blog post or maybe it’s just a comment that says something like, “Um, that’s whack!”

Cause: That blog post, comment, or tweet draws even more attention to the original outlandish thing.

Effect: The once tiny statement, in context or out of context, starts getting mentioned to that leaders often enough where they think they have to respond. Maybe his co-workers mention it to him or maybe he’s gotten some emails or phone calls about it or maybe his statement ends up on a big name blog with a headline, “Christian leader thinks ______.”

[Pause] This is where a critical choice is made. The leader, who now feels exposed, has to chose what to do next. The smartest thing to do is to either apologize for the stupid statement or at a minimum just move on. About 90% of people do this. But lately a new option has taken on popularity. The original offender goes on the offensive against the person who has called them out. It’s like a train wreck from here on out! [unpause]

Cause: The Christian leader rallies his troops (friends, fans, staff) to defend him. It sounds noble, but it’s really throwing gasoline onto a smoldering fire. By taking a victims position these troops are poised to stand up and cry foul. Here comes the Christianese.

Effect: The person who originally mentioned the statement is blind-sided by tons of comments and emails demanding that he stop attacking this leader. Typically, without a leg to stand on, these troops will go the politically correct angle and say, “Who are you to call this persons integrity into question” or “do you think this is glorifying to God to defame ____?” In effect, two wrongs don’t make a right. The person who called out the leader is now put on the defensive simply for bringing up that the leader said something outlandish.

Cause: The Christian leader uses his platform (blog, Facebook, Twitter account, or even pulpit) to joke about how he has haters. Maybe he even makes fun of the person who brought it up in the first place? His aim in doing this is deflect the impact of his original offensive remark by pointing out how the person who called him out is a worse sinner than he is.

Effect: The community of people who have observed this entire exchange are left with less respect for Christian leaders.

My point? If you say something stupid, just acknowledge it, apologize for it, and move on. Taking it this far is buying a ticket for Jerk City. I really think that leaders who pursue the steps after the [pause] are just insecure in their position. In other words, you don’t see people who have been in visible positions for a long time getting tangled up in this sort of thing. They’ve learned that the best response is just to recognize their mistake and apologize as soon as possible.

For the record, I’ve been on every side of this story! I just hope I’m growing up enough to buy a lot fewer tickets to Jerk City.

As I’ve talked about here a few times, Kristen and I have collaborated to create a new website. In truth, it’s just a convergence of two great passions for both of us… blogging and eating!

The whole point of BeyondTheZoo.com is to help people discover hidden gems in San Diego County. We know that when people come to visit they will automatically check out the zoo. And we love the zoo! Our hope is to help visitors (and locals) discover unique and fun hole in the walls.

Of course, Kristen and I have always loved finding unique places! Wherever we’ve lived we have hunted for special places to take our friends. So, BeyondTheZoo.com is really just fulfilling a lifelong passion and pursuit.

Anyway, this is what we’ve been working on for the last month. So far, it’s been a blast working with Kristen on the design. We’ve taken a lot of what we learned by starting YMX and applied some wisdom, too.

And… we waited to launch it until January 1st so I could fulfill my only New Year’s resolution of 2008. No new websites! This is our first.. I’ve got a few more I’ve been dying to launch.

As I’ve been mentioning, Kristen and I are working on a new website. We’ve settled on a launch date of January 1st… which puts us deep into preparations.

To be honest, today was the first time we really sat down to map out the plan for this site. Up until now it’s just been something we talked about every once in a while. Now it is really, really happening! It’s going to be fun! And it’ll probably be a great excuse for us to check out a billion new places in San Diego.

Long story short, this is the design I created based on our meeting today. I’d really like to hear some constructive criticism. How could we make it better?

Maybe you’re ready to take this relationship to the next level? Let’s say you come to Adam McLane’s site every day. And you’re thinking to yourself… “Adam, I dig what you have to say. What are some ways you can check out what else I do online?” Here are a few ways I suggest you do that.

#1 Subscribe to my RSS feed. This will make sure you get every post delivered to your RSS reader, iGoogle homepage, or even by email.

#2 Subscribe to the YS Podcast. You’ll see my pretty face each week on the weekly show that I host. Sure, it isn’t much… but it’s just enough Adam McLane to not feel like a total stalker. Don’t use iTunes? Subscribe via YouTube.

#3 Join my delicious network. Now we’re getting serious. (Rounding 2nd base!) Each day I bookmark all sorts of things. Blog posts, news stories, adolescent research studies, new websites, and all manner of web goodness. Like the links in the YS newsletters? This is like the full monty of that.

#4 Check out my shared items on Google Reader. These are blogs that I read on a daily basis and posts that I think are worth sharing. In other words, let me filter through the lame stuff for you.

#5 Follow me on Twitter. If you’re curious what I’m up to 10-20 times per day, I post to this micro-blogging site in 140 characters or less.

#6 Be my friend on Facebook. You won’t find me on Myspace anymore. I haven’t deleted my account, but I never ever go there. You will find me a lot on Facebook. Me likey Facebook.

#7 Of course you can get to know Kristen too. It’s like getting to know our family 360 degrees. Kristen blogs a lot about family life, recipes, contests, and kids books.

#8 Check out some of our new projects. Kristen and I have started some projects under the umbrella of McLane Creative. Our first project is a collaborative site giving real-world reviews of things to do in San Diego, called Beyond the Zoo.

#9 Meet me in person. I know, that’s not a Web 2.0 way to get to know me. (What is wrong with me?) But it’s completely practical. If you’re ever in the San Diego area I’d love to get together for a cup of coffee and meet face-to-face. Drop me an email.

#1 The Personal Preference Sin (several follow-up posts in process)

#2 How Should Church Staff be Treated?

#3 Don’t Bail Out US Automakers

#4 I Get Paid for This?

#5 The Lord’s Prayer, a Paraphrase

The youth ministry world has seen a decline in the quantity and quality of youth ministry blogs. I don’t have any research to back that statement up, but as a person who spends his life blogging the world of youth ministry I can say that I find it harder and harder to find great blog posts about youth ministry. The known bloggers have gotten better, and there are plenty of youth groups who have a blog as their groups website. But by and large I find it harder and harder to find the middle of the road youth worker who is just blogging about day-to-day challenges.

The flip side is that I see a huge increase in the number of Facebook users and Twitter users in the youth ministry world.

- Does this represent a change from the personal website to mass microblogging?

- Is it that blogging, as a fad, is fading?

- Is it that I’m just stuck up and I don’t see some new bloggers out there who are doing a great job?

- Or has Twitter provided a more immediate outlet for youth workers to connect? Is it just faster and easier?

p.s. If you’re not already a friend of mine on Facebook or following me on Twitter consider yourselves invited.

So you’re minding your own business and doing your thing. Then the phone rings and a friend calls saying something like this, “Did you know that someone in the church wrote about you on their blog? They didn’t say nice things! What are you going to do about it?”

I can understand. For one thing, I’ve been contacted by my fair share of people who aren’t happy about something I posted here on my blog. I’ve even been contacted by the concerned party who was just worried that I might blog about something. On the other hand I’ve seen my fair share of criticism. I’ve been blasted many times on blogs, facebook, myspace, forums, and of course the old fashioned way… church gossip.

So… what’s Adam’s strategy for dealing with public criticism? I’ll let you in on my secrets. But just keep these secrets between us, OK? I wouldn’t want any f my critics to know how I will respond.

Secret #1 I see everything. Thanks to the wonder of the internet I am typically alerted automatically within an hour of something posted about me, my family, or things I care about. That means I am almost never surprised by a phone call like I mentioned above. Almost always I’ve already read the critique and decided what I’m going to do! There are both paid and free options for doing this… unless you’re Joel Olsteen the free options should do the trick.

Secret #2 I ignore almost everything. That’s right. Even the worst criticisms are worth ignoring. Let’s say someone didn’t like what I said in church and they blog about it. Is that swipe really hurting me? Not really. I don’t perpetrate myself as perfect. And I’m big enough to take a couple of shots. I’m also not concerned about “online reputations” too much. If I ran around with a chip on my shoulder about every negative thing being said about me, my people, or my work… I’d end up looking pretty stupid wouldn’t I? Here’s the dirty secret of criticism online: A link is a link. Google could care less if it’s a positive link or a negative link to your blog. All links help your online reputation.

Secret #3 When a lie resonates, invite a discussion. In my life, about 1:100 criticisms do get responded to because that same lie or critique is starting to pop up on other blogs, discussions, articles, or other places. In other words… if I ignore a criticism 99% of the time it will go away quickly. That’s really the beauty of the internet! There are so many blogs out there that 99% of posts really aren’t remarkable. People read blog entries so fast that chances are no one even noticed the critique. But that 1% of bad things said will get picked up by other bloggers. When that happens I need to think about a response strategy. When I do respond my first step is always to invite a person saying something publicly to contact me privately. I give them my name, the link to the critique, my phone number, and personal email address. If that blog has an email I send them a message there. If not, I leave a comment inviting them to discuss the criticism privately. Some disagree with that, but I prefer to discuss a criticism privately.

Secret #4 I vent about it, privately. I don’t care how important you are… getting slammed hurts. Even the trivial “who, said what? hahahaha!” ones hurt a little. As a pastor you put everything you’ve got into your ministry so any critique seems intensely personal. I fight my self-righteous attitude to say something here on my blog or to call and demand a person take it back. Further, most pastors don’t realize that they are in the public eye… you may be the most famous person most people in your church know! Here’s the trick. You need some outlets for that anger… and the people around me know full well what this is like. I will read something, make a “huh” little laugh and then talk to one of the people close to me about it. Try it, it helps. that way if I end up responding it is never out of anger.

Secret #5 Truth always wins. The fact of the matter is that you will do some dumb things. I know I’ve said, written, and done some incredibly idiotic things. If you only ever do safe things you will never be criticized. But the good news is that if you’re a good guy, you’ll always be a good guy. You can’t please everyone and it’s not worth trying.

Secret #6 There is an ounce of truth in every criticism. That’s why I read them all. WIth an understanding that all criticisms have something to teach me, I think I’m getting a little bit smarter!

Super quick note regarding missing posts. I don’t know what happened. They were there this morning, lots and lots of comments. Tonight I saw they were gone.

I was able to report them just now… they were all back dated a bit to try to get them in the right place.

As for the comments, sadly they are all in the database but not linked to the right post and therefore won’t show up. I am really sad about that because there were so many great thoughts!

This is total behind the scenes stuff. But I’ll be moving my personal and friend’s blogs to another host soon.

I don’t know about you. But I read a ton of blogs every day. Here are two trends I’m seeing a lot of.

#1 Senior pastors hyping their new series. Every one of their series is “incredible” or “the most important I’ve ever done.” Call me a cynic but I really doubt it. If you have to hype your own series on your blog something tells me you need to re-examine your churches marketing plan.

#2 Talking about social networking tools. How to use facebook and twitter. And also, I see a lot of trend jumping as people who want to be hip are pimping out “the new thing” that may take off. I kind of think people do this because they want to be known as the person who was in early on the next facebook or twitter.