Search results for: “good news”

  • Jesus Calls Us to Action, Sunday Morning is a Call to Passive

    My Observation

    From 1994 to 2008 my life revolved around the platform. I was either preparing for being in full-time vocational ministry or in it. God had called me to teach and as a result I felt fulfilled in that mission when I stood on the platform teaching. But in 2008, all of that changed as I transitioned from up-front, vocational ministry to my current role training, encouraging, and resourcing those in vocational ministry.

    From 1994 – 2008 I would tell you that one of my primary spiritual gifts was teaching. Now? Maybe I express it differently, but I rarely teach in a traditional setting anymore.

    And that transition– from platform to pew— has put me in a unique spot. I know, quite well, what it’s like on the platform. I feel more native there than I do in the pews. So, while I am now a pew-sitter in church I strongly identify with those on the platform. And sometimes, sitting in those pews, I make observations that I feel like I need to share.

    In this case, this observation has sat in my draft folder for more than 2 years! It’s my heart but I’ve been fearful of sharing it for fear of the backlash. I hope it’s somehow useful to you.

    It is…

    My Lament

    As a guy sitting in the pews I can’t help but be stricken by the passive life you are calling me to.

    Come to church and sit. Listen to the staff talk. Sing some songs. Listen to a 40 minute sermon. Sing some more songs. Go to Sunday school and listen some more. Every point of application is so simple, so packaged, and so…

    Convenient.

    I see how you did that. Your message pointed me to the cause of the week. Aw, shucks. You’ve made it so easy. Loving Jesus is so… easy, packaged, simple, and conveniently located near a camera so we can celebrate next week. 

    And yet, when I open my Bible and read nearly any page I see this stark contrast: There is action from Genesis to Revelation. The entire book of Lamentations is an admonishment for sitting and doing nothing while the world is upside down with corruption.

    We Like to Teach… You Like to Sit… The Disconnect

    That seems to be the narrative. Come and get information. We don’t care if you ever live it out. Just come back next week for the next installment.

    Yet, when I zoom out the lens on Jesus’ entire message for how to live He seems to point people away from a Temple lifestyle, one where you engage with God at a place in packaged ways, He admonishes over and over again— “This Temple thing ain’t it, friends. God’s at work in the neighborhoods all the time, not just for a couple hours on the Sabbath.

    And so we have an inborn disconnect. I’ll go about my day, I’ll go to work this week… you know, with the sinners. And you’ll go to your work this week… you know, sit in the church and think about what life is like with the sinners. God’s called you to help me with my life but you don’t really have a clue what I even do day-to-day.

    I look around and see blue collar types, people who get their coffee at 7-11. And you hang out at Starbucks.

    It’s a disconnect which leads to two epic streams of bad assumptions. I know you truly care so I assume you really get me, but you don’t. And you seem to assume I don’t really want to do anything, that I’m too busy, but I’m not. 

    I don’t just need the Good News to be true for me on Sunday’s. I need to see the Good News alive in my daily life. And my neighbors? Holy moley do they need Good News to be for real.

    My Hope

    What would happen if Sunday morning stopped being a passive call to come back next week or deeper levels of involvement with [insert whatever busy work your church has for me] and started being a call to action to live like Jesus?

    I wonder what that would even look like? Actually, I dream about it. Please release me! Get me out of this passive spot.

    I don’t like being counted. Why are you always counting? You preach and I get counted. I go to a meeting and I get counted. Come to a potluck and someone counts. When I teach Sunday School seemingly the most important thing to do is count.

    What if we started counting things that mattered? Like, wouldn’t it be cool if you counted on me not being there? Isn’t that what it means to live out my faith? Shouldn’t what I do between your incessant counting actually matter? How about we count that?

    Why don’t we do that?

    Your fear

    I’ll tell you what would happen. And why you shudder at the thought. People would get so busy living out their faith that they would stop coming to your Bible studies, your youth group, your choir rehearsals, and your clean-up Saturdays. You are afraid that if people really live out their faith your count will be effected.

    Sometimes I worry that the whole reason we do this is not so that I’ll do something but so that you can teach.

    Don’t worry. You won’t be useless if you start teaching people to be active. Quite the opposite, because I’m really going to need you then. And when we gather it’ll be a monster celebration of what God is doing. And if you think about it, this will make your teaching so much more important.

    So please, count on me to do something more than sit on my hands.

    Please.

    Please.

    Please.

  • Join us for Open Seattle

    I’m getting really pumped for Open Seattle next week. If you live in the Pacific Northwest we’d love to have you. Yesterday, we extended the regular registration deadline until next Monday– so you can still get in for $25!

    What’s Open Seattle?

    Open is an experiment. It’s asking the the youth ministry world the question… “What would happen if we completely flipped the script on a youth ministry training event?

    • What if a national organization gave leadership to local organizers?
    • What if front-line youth workers were favored in speaker selection over those on the speaking circuit?
    • What if we took chances instead of playing it safe on the stuff we present?
    • What if The Youth Cartel didn’t have to fly its name out front, but instead lifted up the names of its partners?
    • What if none of the speakers got paid? What if I didn’t have to get paid to help organize it… I just did it for a fair share?
    • Speaking of money, what if a local YM charity was benefited financially?
    • Heck, what if we just posted the full event budget online for anyone to see?
    • Why not record everything and then share all the sessions with the community on a central website… so no matter where you live you can have access to training resources and the freshest ideas out there on the ground?
    • What if we perfected the thing and just kind of open-sourced THE WHOLE THING so we can help people who have been to one organize one themselves?
    My hope for the answer to all of those questions is… I think that the best ideas will be given a voice. My hope is that when front-line youth workers get an opportunity to share what they know and even their big, crazy ideas with a group of people just like them… that it’ll spur on more ideas and spark new innovations with the net result that we’ll reach more teenagers with the Good News.

    So yes, it’s an experimental thing. Originally there was a lot of risk. It was really hard to explain the overall concept to the first few partners– Jeff at SPU, Brian Aaby at YouthMark, Mark Moder at Youth Dynamics. But as we kept talking about it this idea really took off. They made the idea even better.

    At this point in preparation– I’m not feeling this is as big a risk anymore. Actually, when I look at the people who are presenting and the folks who are coming I don’t see a lot of risk. Now I just see an awesome, affordable, innovative event. 

    We’ve got two tracks of learning. One is training, it’s full of great stuff as a refresher for the paid person and covering a lot of bases for your volunteers. The second track is all about ideas. It’s got some stuff in there that’ll cause you to scratch your head or write stuff down or just plain want to wrestle the speaker at the after party.

    For $25 You Get

    1. 16 sessions
    2. A free t-shirt
    3. The ability to say you were at the very first one of these. (We’ve got two more planned for this school year, one in Boston and one in Paris.)

    In 2013-2014 we hope to add 6 more of these as we beta test the concept… 4 more in the United States, 1 more in Europe, and 1 Lord willing, in Canada.

    I hope to see you next weekend on the campus of Seattle Pacific University. And if you can’t make it there, I hope to see you at an Open event soon.

  • How to Disembark from the S.S. Fantasia

    Delay is the deadliest form of denial.
    ~ C. Northcote Parkinson

    Have you ever talked to someone and wondered… is this person living on the same planet that I am? This is a bizarre cultural phenomenon all too common among church leaders. Their day-to-day life, ministry, and sadly ministry aspirations are not based on reality but a fantasy version of reality that they have created for themselves.

    This disconnection often manifests itself to me when false assumptions have driven decision-making and engagement with their local community.

    • Building a ministry around an assumption of the nuclear family. (In denial of the reality of their own extended family and in the face that the community they are trying to reach has no cultural reference to this ideal.)
    • Shrugging off the lack of racial/ethnic diversity in their organization. (In denial of statistical fact that all of America, not just urban centers, have experienced a major shift in statistical balance over the past 10 years.)
    • Redefining ministry measurables to fit the make-up of what happens naturally versus what ought to happen. (In denial of the role of organizational entropy, the reality that if you measure your impact based purely on who comes, eventually this will lead you to a crushing vortex of inward thinking.)

    Sometimes, almost never intentionally and certainly by apathy, I see organizations struggling not merely because they have the wrong people in leadership or because they are bad people or because they have bad values. But they are struggling because they aren’t living in their own present reality. They are trying to win a game no one else is playing. 

    They may be perfectly positioned to take community-changing action but work extremely hard on the wrong things.

    Surrounded by people who think just like them (known as groupthink) they organization sales the seas of their community on the S.S. Fantasia. 

    3 practical steps to help you anchor your assumptions in reality

    Let’s get grounded in putting our academic study to work for us!

    • Regularly review census and other statistical data in your immediate area. If once per quarter your leadership team reviewed the latest statistical data publicly available for free via the census and the myriad of government organizations in your community, you could regularly make small decisions based on what you learn. For instance, if the school district releases a profile of new students which shows a spike in a demographic you could ask the most obvious question, “What can we do to serve this new group of people?Don’t understand this or does this seem too hard? Make an appointment with a school administrator or local college sociologist who will gladly share this data and help you understand it.
    • Regularly ask for cultural observations during team meetings. You don’t need to be a trained ethnographer to do basic ethnography. Your team is already spending time outside of the office in the community you are trying to reach… add a new question to your weekly meetings asking for one thing you observed. Maybe its that women outnumber men at a coffee shop during the day? Maybe its about what people are wearing or driving or reading. We all gather this data but until we share it with our teams we can’t make adjustments. Don’t think your team can handle this? We asked groups to do this in our Good News in the Neighborhood curriculum, middle schoolers can handle it!
    • Define your geographical target and make decisions to benefit those within that area. Face the reality that there are lots and lots of organizations/churches/ministries just like yours. Don’t be a purveyor of the rule of affinity, that’s a short-term strategy built on a false assumption that people will always like what you are doing. Instead, define your target area… be it by a mile radius or specific streets or even a zip code. And then, when you make decisions, ask yourself what’s best based on what you know from regular statistical data and cultural observations from within that target area. If you really want to go crazy– reward your staff for moving into that area and only nominate unpaid leaders like elders who come from that target area. That will begin to send the message that your organization is about that geographical area.

    What are S.S. Fantasia things you see in your area/context/ministry? What’s driving you crazy? 

  • The Rule of Affinity

    The Rule of Affinity

    Two men had robbed a bank a few miles away and while being chased by the police made a wrong turn into our neighborhood. Full of canyons and dead ends the robbers got lost, ditched their car, shot at a cop, and ran into backyards a few hundred yards from our house. Soon a police helicopter hovered over our block.

    After a little while the sound was aggravating– infuriating even. It shook our house and rattled our nerves. While the police told us to stay inside and away from their barricades everyone was drawn out of their house by the thunderous claps of the helicopters blades.

    It stayed like this for 5 hours.

    That’s what it took for neighbors to talk. A police barricade. Locked down on a Saturday afternoon and each of us couldn’t stand being in our houses. With no way to escape… we were forced to talk. Names were shared, hands were shaken, houses were pointed to, stories were told, and we all got to know one another a little bit.

    The Rule of Affinity is so powerful in our culture that this is what it takes to meet the people who live within 300 yards of my bedroom. Power outages, blizzards, bad storms, earthquakes, and other moments that force us awake from our Affinity stupor reminding us that there are actual people behind those front doors and mailboxes.

    The Rule of Affinity is all-powerful. I don’t mean that it’s an axiom or a rule of thumb, I mean that it rules our lives like a king rules his people.

    • Where you work is defined by affinity.
    • Where you worship is defined by affinity.
    • Who you are friends with is defined by affinity.
    • What you do with your free time is defined by affinity.
    • What you eat? Affinity.
    • What you wear? Affinity.

    This list never ends because affinity rules our lives. Our affluence affords us choices. And our choices drive us to seek deeper and deeper levels of affinity. We do what we do because we like it and avoid what we don’t like.

    Think about it like this: Whenever you have a choice, the Rule of Affinity drives your choice to gather not by proximity but by affinity. 

    The internet, especially social media, amplifies this effect. Because you can find community with people just like you online you don’t need proximity. Affinity allows you to consider your best friends to be people you’ve never met face-to-face. You know 500 things about a stranger but nothing about a neighbor. That’s the power of the Rule of Affinity over your life.

    And yet, the Rule of Affinity is actually killing your soul. You feel like you’ve found community with people just like you but what you’ve really found is communal loneliness and further isolation.

    Affinity is shallow. It’s weak. It’s junk food. It lacks the full flavor and nutritional value of Proximity.  Intellectually, affinity is small. It’s easy. It’s drinking a Coke and calling it a fine vintage. It’s foregoing literature for a grocery aisle romance novel. One result is that we live in a society of psychiatric drugs. We medicate the pain caused by the Rule of Affinity’s malnutrition. Filled with false community and Affinity’s lies about our place in the world we lean on drugs to seek a normal we know nothing of. As we drive toward further and further affinity we gain more and more isolation, our soul starving our soul further, eventually leaving us a rotten core of our true selves.

    The Gospel, the Good News of Jesus, challenges us to reject the Rule of Affinity for the realities of Proximity. In the Garden, Satan tempted Eve with affinity… “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” (Genesis 3:5) While Adam and Eve had perfect Proximity to God, Satan tempted them with the Rule of Affinity where they could gather with God on their terms.

    The Gospel overcomes the Rule of Affinity and re-introduces the Garden’s Proximity into our lives. Jesus’ re-introduction of Proximity looks at the bank robbers face and says, “There’s a better way. You seek something temporary and I offer something permanent and beautiful.

    Jesus gutted the Rule of Affinity with His invitation to new way of living,

    Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

    Matthew 22:37-39

  • 10 Horrible Halloween Treat Ideas

    If you care about being Good News in Your Neighborhood, Halloween is one of the easiest days on the calendar to get out and meet a lot of people. Since 2005, I’ve written a number of posts encouraging fellow Christians to embrace Halloween as an opportunity to meet your neighbors.

    So I won’t rehash why we celebrate Halloween or re-share some of the things we’ve done in the past to practice hospitality.

    But I do want to say that not every idea is a good idea. And not every treat idea is a good treat idea. Every year my kids come home from trick-or-treating and lay out all of their candy on the floor. As they carefully examine each treat some of them get labeled as “junk.” (Something healthy. Or even a dime store toy.) Giving out “junk” is the biggest insult you can give a kind on Halloween night. Don’t be that guy.

    Here’s a list of 10 really horrible Halloween treat ideas NOT to try this year.

    1. Ketchup packets – Cheap, and you probably have a drawer full of them already. But I not a treat that’ll make a 6 year old happy.
    2. Bacon bits – Bacon is always a welcome addition. And bacon bits would be awesome with a snack sized Snickers. But little ziplocks of bacon bits would be gross.
    3.  Beef jerky – Jerky would look amazing to give away. In the dark it might look like poop, and kids would think that was funny, but an assortment of cured meats would be a bit too creepy.
    4.  KFC wet naps – Probably useful, especially if their face paint starts to run, but just don’t do this one. It’s really odd.
    5. Roll of electrical tape – I know its tempting to go through your garage to find random items to pawn off on kids. While a roll of tape would be a good bargain, most kids won’t know what to do with it.
    6. Sample size toothpaste – I get it. You work at a dental office and you get it for free. And why not encourage kids to brush their teeth after eating all of that candy. But no, really weird. Unless it looks like blood. Blood is cool on Halloween.
    7. Plastic spoon – Nothing says, “I hate you” quite like a random bit of disposable cutlery. Just don’t do this. Megan (11) said this would be the dumbest thing ever.
    8. Band aids – Really weird and gross. Say no to the adhesive bandage.
    9. A pickle – I love pickles. Probably more than I love bacon. But can you imagine the look on kids faces when you dropped a dripping wet pickle in their bag?
    10. Canned food item – Hold off on unloading that unwanted can of stewed chutney until Novembers canned food drive, OK?

    Question: What would be the worst costume you could wear if you wanted to become Good News in Your Neighborhood?

  • Turn up the love

    Like you, I’m shocked at the popularity of Haterade.

    a figurative drink representing a modality of thought. those who consume it are themselves consumed by the negativity which with they speak.

    ~ Urban Dictionary Word of the Day, July 26th 2005

    It feels like Haterade is on sale all over Facebook and Twitter these days. People are endlessly extreme and full of hate. It’s as if the middle ground approach, one which gives and takes for the sake of mutuality, has been replaced by an either or mentality… either you are for me or against me. I love people who are for me and damned be the name of anyone who is opposed.

    It’s shocking. 

    I Blame the Internet

    Before Facebook, Twitter, blogs, and Huffington Post… you had to talk to people face-to-face at some point. Additionally, it was harder to find community for extremism. You talked things out a bit more with real people and there was social pressure to move from the extremities of a position more to the middle, something socially digestible, and socially acceptable. Because if you held onto your extreme position your world got really, really small.

    If you didn’t then you were that crazy person on the block with the signs in your yard and 15 dogs.

    The internet reverses this. In order to find community you need to refine your positions. You end up forming community with people just like you, who think just like you, and see things just like you… and that is the fountain from which Haterade flows. In time, you get more popular within an online community when you can clearly articulate and defend the group’s position to others outside of your group. Instead of social sparring knocking the edges off of extreme positions it goes the other way towards reaction.

    As people move more and more of their relationships online we can expect more and more extremism and less and less love, tolerance, and middle ground.

    When an extreme crime occurs in a community, say a school shooting, the news always reports the same things about the shooter. “They kept to themselves” or “They were really quiet neighbors” or “They seemed like loners.”  It leaves me shouting at the TV… “Why are you talking to the neighbors? You should be talking to his friends online. That’s who knows the shooter!

    Very few people truly know their neighbors enough to be a character witness for them. Maybe we know about them? But do we truly know them?

    That’s rhetorical. We don’t know our neighbors all that well.

    Back to the Coffee Shops

    My dad is a coffee shop guy. For as long as I can remember he’s gotten up at the butt crack of dawn and gone to a local coffee shop to socialize. And by coffee shop I’m not talking about Starbucks or 7-11. I’m talking about the local greasy spoon. A place with a griddle, a wrap-around counter, and an owner who doubles as cook, cashier, server, and moderator. Decades before Facebook and Twitter, coffee shops were the places where folks checked in with one another, gave status updates, and talked about the news of the day.

    We Need Love for Our Neighbors

    That’s something missing in our society. For millennia, neighbors gathered locally for daily chores like this. Women met at the watering hole. Men talked on their way to the hunting grounds or fields. Every society has a type of coffee shop. Romans met at the baths. Greeks met at the agora. On and on.

    And now? We meet no where just to talk. Most people know little about their communities.

    Even at our churches… there’s almost no talking. There are 1% of people who speak and 99% of people who listen. (This, too has changed dramatically in recent decades, leading to extremism. But that’s another topic for another day.) You are seen as a good congregant if you listen well, take notes, smile at the pastor and say nice things. But offer a rebuttal or ask a question? That’s disrespecting authority. Church is anti-coffee-shop… and it wasn’t always like that.

    Left alone, we’ve all become the crazy dog man on our blocks who posts random, hate filled signs. We are encouraged to hold extreme positions created in isolation from one another. And our society is worse off for it. 

    Do you want to be Good News on your block? Open a “coffee shop.”

  • 3 Things I’m Wondering About What Church Leaders Believe

    Yesterday, Kristen and I went to the Willow Creek Global Leadership Summit. It’s an event I’ve always loved… I’ve gone 3-4 times in the past decade and the years that I couldn’t make it I always wanted to. Looking back, it’s an event where I always learn a lot.

    I’m probably a lot like you. I’m tired of talking about why humpty dumpty sat on a wall, why he had a great fall, or why all the kings horses and all the kings men couldn’t put humpty dumpty back together again. Deconstruction is so… 2005. My time is spent coming up with ways to reconstruct the church in new ways, in ways that people currently disconnected from Christ want to connect with Him. It comes from a deep respect for the Scriptures, leaning into the truths of the Gospel, and a relentless hope that our best days must be ahead.

    All that to say– I walked away with 3 things I’m wondering about based on what I heard yesterday. These were the working, meta-narrative, definitions of how the speakers/hosts seemed to view the world around them. And it left me wondering… is this what they really believe?

    1. The church is the hope of the world – I walked away wondering… Is that really a true statement? I know I just have an undergrad Bible college degree. And I picked Spanish in college because Greek and Hebrew didn’t seem all that practical for youth ministry. But I think Jesus is the hope of the world. I think the church is the bride of Christ. The church is Hope’s wife, they are wed, they are one… but the church is not the Hope of the world. Jesus is. (I can accept the phrase as a metaphor but the phrase was not said as a metaphor– it was said as an axiom/truism/fact.)
    2. Neighbors are people you invite to church – I walked away wondering about the application of one of the stories… Bill Hybels told a story about a man who came to their property looking for his cat. The man asked Bill, “What is this place?” (Assuming it was a college) Bill used that story to illustrate that they, for the first time in 30 years, needed to do some marketing to retell the Willow story to people in their community. His story left me screaming inside! Dude, you blew it. Jesus didn’t say, “Love your neighbor and invite them to church.” He said, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” The guy didn’t come and ask Bill for a flyer or an invitation to church. He wanted help looking for his cat. It was an invitation for Bill to go to the man’s house! It was an invitation to get to know his neighbor— not fill his mailbox inviting neighbors to hear him preach. Oh, I really wanted that to be a turning point for Bill to see that a church dispersed in its community, as Hope’s representative and wife, is far more potent than a church coming to his “college.” [If you know me, you know my prayer is that the church becomes Good News in the Neighborhood.]
    3. Leadership is the most important spiritual gift – Oh, there was so much insider language and playing to a senior pastor audience about “leadership!” Bill Hybels repeatedly pumped up leadership as the only important spiritual gift. He “thanked God” that he didn’t have the other gifts. (There was a lot of woman bashing from the stage, too. I hope someone mentions that to him. That’s beneath leaders of his caliber.) It made me wonder about the definition of Christian leadership. Paul makes it clear in 1 Corinthians 12, no one is more important in the body of Christ than anyone else. And Jesus corrected his disciples again and again… to be great, you must be a servant. (Mark 10:42-45) Those weren’t popular concepts at Willow’s Summit. In fact, in an interview with an organization that has two equal leaders the question came up again and again… “Is it possible to have 2 leaders?

    So that’s what I left wondering with after day 1. Just wondering. Not criticizing or tearing down. Just wondering. 

    If you went to WCAGLS— what were your highlights? What did you leave wondering about? 

    QUICK UPDATE: Day 2 of WCAGLS was very good, I didn’t stick around for Bill’s closing talk, but really enjoyed all of the speakers today. Pranitha Timothy was absolutely stunning today. Very thankful for that talk.

  • Too old for games

    In act one of last week’s This American Life entitled, Amusement Parks, Ira Glass [America’s best preacher] spends time with Cole Lindbergh. Cole is the manager of the games department for an amusement park called Worlds of Fun in the Kansas City area.

    Cole is an amusement park management geek. His life revolves, wholly and completely, around the 30+ teenagers he manages all summer. His job is to supervise them as well as make sure that they bring in as much revenue for the games as humanly, legally possible.

    He does this by creating a culture of fun and competition. He only hires extroverts that thrive behind that annoying amusement park microphone. Then he pits them all against each other to motivate them, make it fun, and drive up sales. His teenage employees go all out to make as much money as possible, often working 12-13 hours per day. One employee interviewed was so into the competition that she forgot to take a break… for 13 hours. (Um, child labor laws anyone?)

    But near the end of the piece Cole got reflective. He’s 25 years old. He quit his last year of college for an opportunity for this job. His girlfriend says that the job is stressing their relationship to the point where she’s said that if he doesn’t finish school their relationship can’t move forward.

    But, internally, Cole faces a bigger problem. As a 25 year old supervisor he knows his days are numbered. He’s reached the pinnacle for being cool to teenagers. They do everything he says and love working for him, but he can feel it starting to slip away.

    The Creepy Divide

    Cole knows he is about to cross an age barrier from cool, 20-someething guy who loves to hang with high school students to… late 20-something guy who loves to hang with high school students. And he knows that’s creepy. 

    25 year olds should want to have 25 year old friends. And jobs that aren’t making music videos with teenagers. And his girlfriend wants to get married and have kids… and he knows that means giving up this silly job.

    Cole knows he’s too old for games. But he loves it and is afraid to give it up. He is afraid of what’s on the other side of the creepy divide.

    Crossing the Creepy Divide in Youth Ministry

    25 seems to be that age in youth ministry, too. Many readers of this blog are in their early 20’s, just getting started. They have no idea that pretty soon… inviting 6 girls over to make cookies for a bake sale is about to get creepy. Or having 6 guys meet you at a coffee shop for a bible study. Yeah, that’s creepy too. And playing dodgeball with 12 year olds? Creepy for a grown adult. (Until you hit about 50. Then it becomes bean grandpa in the face… which is always cool.) Have a small group over to play video games until 2 AM… that’s all creepy all the time when you are 32.

    Then again, maybe I’m alone in that? Maybe I feel creepy when I shouldn’t at all? Maybe I just suck as a youth worker and I need to get over feeling creepy, go buy something from [insert cool store name] and try to fit in?

    The Good News of Aging in Youth Ministry

    It’s not that you need to get out of youth ministry when you hit your mid-20s and beyond. It’s that the hang out factor needs to adapt. In fact, as you get a bit older in this thing you want to hang less and invest more. You have family and jobs and other responsibilities.

    It’s not that its bad or wrong to hang out with 16 year olds endlessly, for no real purpose. It’s that you aren’t cool anymore. It’s not cool for a 13 year old to chill at the youth pastors house, with his kids, for no reason for hours and hours. Just like it’d be creepy if your teenage daughter hung out with her softball coach, at his house, it’s creepy and looks weird just to hang.

    Instead… as you get older in this you feel less like you need to be friends with students. And you can focus on what’s really important.

    Is there hope for Cole?

    Maybe. He won’t like it. But if he wants to continue his career as the games manager at the amusement park, he’ll need to adapt his game.

    And if you’re in youth ministry and you are crossing that creepy divide. Adapt your game and stick it out another decade. It’s totally doable.

  • Proactive vs. Reactive

    The past year or so has taught me all new levels of being proactive that I’d never needed to be before. 

    • Shipping orders for our store, tracking packages, and making adjustments to our shipping rates to keep up with USPS.
    • Um, getting people to buy stuff from said store means that I have to order from the manufacturer, build their shipping costs into my costs, market the products, and a whole bunch more stuff.
    • Helping a wide variety of organizations with their web development needs has meant deeply listening to what they are asking for and proposing solutions they aren’t even imagining.
    • Not having a boss or board has meant that if I’m not on top of it, I’ll work 80 hours per week every week and never take a vacation.
    • Taxes. Oh for the love of all things, I have to track sales tax, city business tax, state & federal income tax, and social security tax. Most of them are due on the same days but you’ve got to watch it! One of the reasons I’m so shy about hiring someone right now is taxes!

    I won’t bore you with the details of all the things I need to stay on top of as a small business owner.

    The point is that when I’m proactive I catch things before they are problems. I discover opportunities I didn’t even know about. I catch mole hills before they are mountains.

    For me, I live in a weird space of half business and half ministry. It’s good business for me to keep on top of things and anticipate stuff to just keep a step ahead. But it’s also a good ministry practice.

    Proactive vs. Reactive

    I think a lot of ministry people get in trouble because they are in a reactive posture as opposed to a proactive one. They are a step-behind the needs of their congregation instead of leading them into a new future.

    A reactive posture is dealing with bad news when your people need good news from you.

    Never forget that people come to Jesus because they need Good News. Not just spiritual teaching, they need Jesus to be their provider, their rescuer, their day-to-day Savior, and their healer.

    And when you can help them be proactive about that? Solid gold.

  • Teenagers and the law

    Yesterday’s ruling by the Supreme Court included some important nuances on the legal understanding of teenagers, their standing in our country, and how the courts view their decision-making abilities.

    Whether you work with teenagers or have one at home– I’ve done my best to synthesize this nuance in both the argument and the opinion of the court. I’m highlighting in red negative words about teenagers abilities, highlighting in blue words which recognize teenage capabilities. That way you can see the dance the courts are making visually.

    The argument made to the Supreme Court

    To start with the first set of cases: Roper and Graham establish that children are constitutionally different from adults for purposes of sentencing. Because juveniles have diminished culpability and greater prospects for reform, we explained, “they are less deserving of the most severe punishments.” Graham, 560 U. S., at ___ (slip op., at 17). Those cases relied on three significant gaps between juveniles and adults. First, children have a “‘lack of maturity and an underdeveloped sense of responsibility,’” leading to recklessness, impulsivity, and heedless risk-taking. Roper, 543 U. S., at 569. Second, children “are more vulnerable . . . to negative influences and outside pressures,”including from their family and peers; they have limited“contro[l] over their own environment” and lack the ability to extricate themselves from horrific, crime-producing settings. Ibid. And third, a child’s character is not as “well formed” as an adult’s; his traits are “less fixed” and his actions less likely to be “evidence of irretrievable depravity.” Id., at 570. 

    Our decisions rested not only on common sense—on what “any parent knows”—but on science and social science as well. Id., at 569. In Roper, we cited studies showing that “‘[o]nly a relatively small proportion of adolescents’” who engage in illegal activity “‘develop entrenched patterns of problem behavior.’” Id., at 570 (quoting Steinberg & Scott, Less Guilty by Reason of Adolescence: Developmental Immaturity, Diminished Responsibility, and the Juvenile Death Penalty, 58 Am. Psychologist 1009, 1014 (2003)). And in Graham, we noted that “developments in psychology and brain science continue to show fundamental differences between juvenile and adult minds”—for example, in “parts of the brain involved in behavior control.” 560 U. S., at ___ (slip op., at 17).5 We reasoned that those findings—of transient rashness, proclivity for risk, and inability to assess consequences—both lessened a child’s “moral culpability” and enhanced the prospect that, as the years go by and neurological development occurs, his “‘deficiencies will be reformed.’” Id., at ___ (slip op., at 18) (quoting Roper, 543 U. S., at 570). 

    Roper and Graham emphasized that the distinctive at- tributes of youth diminish the penological justificationsfor imposing the harshest sentences on juvenile offenders, even when they commit terrible crimes. Because “‘[t]he heart of the retribution rationale’” relates to an offender’s blame worthiness, “‘the case for retribution is not as strong with a minor as with an adult.’” Graham, 560 U. S., at ___ (slip op., at 20–21) (quoting Tison v. Arizona, 481 U. S. 137, 149 (1987); Roper, 543 U. S., at 571). Nor can deterrence do the work in this context, because “‘the same characteristics that render juveniles less culpable than adults’”—their immaturity, recklessness, and impetuosity—make them less likely to consider potential punishment. Graham, 560 U. S., at ___ (slip op., at 21) (quoting Roper, 543 U. S., at 571). Similarly, incapacitation could not support the life-without-parole sentence in Graham: Deciding that a “juvenile offender forever will be a danger to society” would require “mak[ing] a judgment that [he] is incorrigible”—but “‘incorrigibility is inconsistent with youth.’” (pages 8-10)

    The courts ruling

    Although we do not foreclose a sentencer’s ability to make that judgment in homicide cases, we require it to take into account how children are different, and how those differences counsel against irrevocably sentencing them to a lifetime inprison. (page 17)

    Source

    This is from the Supreme Courts ruling on Miller vs. Alabama, a challenge to mandatory life sentences to juvenile murderers. In other words, judges can now take into account the circumstances of the individuals background, their mental ability to understand the crime, their ability to discontinue involvement in the crime, and family life.

    Obviously, I think this is good news for teenagers in general because the courts indicate that adults (and our laws) should not apply to teenagers in the same way, regardless of age.

    Why this matters

    1. GOOD The Supreme Court’s ruling indicates that maturity and cognitive ability to grasp the seriousness of risk is not fixed by age. All 17 year olds are not the same, all 14 year olds are not the same.
    2. GOOD The Supreme Court removes state laws mandatory sentencing for juvenile offenders, even in states where minors are tried as adults for serious felonies. This doesn’t say they can’t get life sentences but it does say that the courts are allowed to to examine the maturity level and family circumstances of individual offenders.
    3. GOOD While nuanced, the language of the majority opinion affirms the capabilities of teenagers. Justice Kagan makes a distinction between a juvenile raised in a stable home with one raised in a chaotic home. She also affirms that the mental capacity to understand cause and effect varies widely between a 14 year old and 17 year old. Did they have the ability to walk away before a crime was committed? Or were they able to grasp the risk to themselves prior to committing a crime? Those are questions of capability.
    4. GOOD The Supreme Court affirms that since a juvenile cannot legally defend themselves in the same way, because of their constitutional definition as a child, that it’s unfair to use the same sentencing guidelines as an adult defendant. That acknowledges the justice gap as its unfair to give someone a life sentence when they can’t properly defend themselves.

    What else do you see in the courts ruling yesterday that I’m missing?

    Photo credit: Charles Pence via Flickr (Creative Commons)