Tag: personal

  • Put Up of Shut Up

    put-up-or-shut-up

    I’m 33 years old. Let’s say I live to be 100. Best case scenario I’ve completed a third of my life. The first third of my life was relatively unremarkable. Looking at the fictional “bucket list” I still have a lot of dreams, goals, and accomplishments left to complete. I have suffered through some hard times. I have experienced great exhilaration and moments of joy. But, with 33 years in the past I’m left with precious little to show for it. A sober judgment of myself reveals that I’ve talked a good game… but don’t have the track record to back up my smack talking. That’s a crisis of self-realization, isn’t it?

    Some respond to this reality in their lives by shutting up. I hope to respond counter to what my cultural leanings say is best. I do not think I’m called to slither away into silence and sit on a list of dreams for the next two-thirds of my life. Personal failures and moderate successes to date aren’t going to stop me from a pursuit of something much greater.

    My personal mantra lately has been, “put up or shut up.” In relationships, I’ve gone into a risk taking mode by radically speaking the truth– making myself more available to some and less available to others. At work, I have a tendency to play it safe– but this mantra has me a lot more vocal. In my family, I realize that I can’t just talk a good game about stuff publicly– so I’ve gotten aggressive in putting up barriers to protect my family from my own stupidity. Those are just three areas of my life I feel like I need to put up or shut up. There are a lot more.

    I look at my first 33 years as preparation for the next 33 years. It’s time for me… In increasing ways to put up or shut up.

    I suppose there is a challenge for any Christian leader in this. This speaks to our worldview as believers. If the Gospel of Jesus Christ is true… it isn’t just a Gospel of personal renewal, it is also the Gospel of institutional, societal, interpersonal, and even corporate renewal.

    “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

    If Ephesians 2:10 is true God’s people are a people of renewal. Their good works make things better and better. It’s my naive hope that women and men who say yes to Jesus will embrace Ephesians 2:10 and wrestle with this reality… they need to put up or shut up. If we are really God’s workmanship the evidence of that will be our good works into our society. When I look at the people and institutions in my life… my society, my company, myself, and my family… I believe that our best days are yet ahead. If I am faithful to God, that is. I believe the reason I am placed in those institutions and relationships is because God prepared in advance for me to be there.

    Conversely, it is the same for anyone who is God’s child. We are called to express the Gospel is tangible ways. (American evangelicalism focuses too much on church and preaching and not enough on application the other 6 days, 23 hours per week) We don’t just have relationships just by coincidence, do we? We don’t have families for biological reasons, we are called to live out the Gospel to our children and ones we are most intimate with. We are not just called to run a program or earn a paycheck, we are called to be God’s workmanship in the workplace. We aren’t just mystically placed into our apartment complex, neighborhood, or city randomly. God chose the work of loving our neighbors for us to do in advance for us to do. Those actions are the Gospel of Jesus Christ flowing through his people and renewing those areas of our lives.

    “Is it time to put up or shut up?”

  • Responding to Stress

    Here are a few categories of responses to job stress. I think I’ve exhibited them all in the past 3 months.

    – The ostrich: This person looks at the stress at work and just sticks their head into their own work, trying to ignore anything else that goes on. This can be good because at times of high stress there is a need for some people to keep plugging away at work. But it can be bad in that this response can lead to that person working on old priorities and foregoing new priorities.

    – The jackal: This person is the cynic. Generally makes fun of the stressful situation. I think of this as a nervous response to stress. This person tends to have a “sky is falling” type of attitude and veils negativity with humor. But this person will also have every intention of being the person to turn out the lights on the last day. Keep working, keep scavenging, it’ll pay off in the end.

    – The parrot: This person repeats everything. Not so much a gossip, but a person who likes to communicate what the problem and solution is as presented. Both helpful and annoying at the same time, this response seems to be a self-motivating one. But the parrot likes to think it is helping those around it.

    – The bear: This person is all black cloud. They think that today is as good as its going to get. Tomorrow is just another day closer to destruction. This stress response is toxic to a stressful situation because its pessimism can become a self-fulfilling prophesy. Their Eeyore belief system is not cautious, it is reckless. This person secretly likes stress. Above I said I’ve expressed all of these in the past three months, that’s not true. I refuse to be the bear.

    – The bull: This person sees an opportunity in everything. Relentlessly over-optimistic. This stress response is helpful in times like this because they don’t care about forecasts and the nightmares MSNBC predicts.

    – The honey bee: Similar to the ostrich, this person just shows up and gets the job done. The swarm of activity around doesn’t seem to matter as this person merely concentrates on building the hive and following the orders of the queen bee. Collect pollen, make honey, repeat. If anything the stressful situation makes this person more urgent.

    – The sloth: This person responds to a stressful situation by retreating. They burn up sick and vacation days. They find excuses to avoid dealing with the cause of the stress. Really, this is just a lazy response to stress. This person hopes that while they are checked out the problem will get resolved.

    – The viper: This person just gets mean. Like a snake, they strike out of fear. They feel like if they are mean they can just scare their problems away. Of course, fear is a short term motivator… but this person doesn’t seem to care about that.

    What are some stress responses I’ve missed?

  • The Personal Preference Sin

    I’d like to talk to some people about a rabid sin running rampant and unchecked throughout the American Evangelical church. Maybe if you’re reading this today I’m meant to talk to you. This is, I believe, one of Satan’s most powerful devices for separating our people. And yet, this sin runs so deep and is so approved that it carries back to some things we hold sacred such as denominations… probably 50% of non-denominational churches founded in the past century are the result of this sin.

    That sin is personal preference.

    An unfortunate consequence of Modernism as a life philosophy is this concept that you cannot worship in a place you disagree with on some levels. Adopting modernistic thinking as a religious way of thinking has lead to nothing but personal preference sin disguised as “acting on theological conviction.” Whether that preference is musical instruments during worship vs. no musical instruments in worship or modern music vs. traditional hymns or small groups vs. Sunday School or even Arminian vs. Calvinist, forms of church governance, women in ministry, preaching styles, baptism, on and on.

    One day, either today or yesterday, a person decided that they simply could not live with that compromise to their integrity or vision or desire and decided to leave a church to start their own. I am convinced that many of today’s churches were founded because someone got ticked off enough to take their friends and start a “new and more pure expression of worship.” If you’ve ever had a meeting with a wide-eyed green church planter you often hear this notion as their primary justification for planting a church.

    You may be uncomfortable with how I’ve phrased that. So let’s give some examples:

    – John Wesley started a methodist reform movement within the Church of England. As time went on, they couldn’t reconcile that tension and the Methodist Movement was born.

    – Meanwhile in Scandinavia, disenfranchised Lutherans (commoners) who were persecuted by the King’s people over tons of issues separated and started meeting outside of official worship services sanctioned by the King. Eventually, they could not reconcile and the Free church movement was born in Scandinavia.

    – The Brethren church movement is born out of a personal preference issue on baptism in the early 18th century. That groups has fractured further ever since… it’s in their DNA! Some of them have split of theological interpretations of things like eternal security, or whether baptisms indoors counted, or to start Sunday schools.

    – There so much independence bred into the Baptist church movement that no one can even agree on what makes a baptist a baptist or where the Baptist movement originated. Many of my students in Romeo will remember how we read an 80 year old tract in my office called, “What real old regular baptists really believe.”

    – These are the tribes, and decedents and fractures of those tribes, that form modern Evangelicalism in America. In other words… we are a people divided for centuries on an unspoken belief that our personal preferences should divide the Bride of Christ. Division over personal preference is our unfortunate heritage.

    Let’s state the problem more clearly in your front yard. Modernism has long hated contradictions and mystery. While that is a noble hatred in science and has led to the greatest innovations of our day, it has decimated the church. People presume that their personal preferences are more significant than the church doctrine of unity.

    As believers, every one of us would agree with this statement: The church body is a unit. (Singular) And yet, we divide over non-essentials all the time.

    – Style of baptism.

    – How a person is labeled a member.

    – How a person is labeled a believer.

    – What types of sin a person can be involved in and still lead and/or be a member.

    – Who can vote and for what.

    – How we learn best.

    – Worship best.

    – Give best.

    – Serve best.

    – Read our Bible.

    – How we dress.

    – How we act.

    – How we pray.

    Rather than live in those tensions, struggles that fully represent the “the body of Christ,” we chose to divide and group with who we feel most comfortable with.

    Largely, on Sunday morning we go to churches who are lead by people we feel comfortable with, who preach to us things we want to hear, who say things to our kids we agree with, who look like us, sing like us, dress like us, and serve in ways we approve of. When I hear complaints of my friends or when I complain about my church it is almost exclusively about crap that doesn’t even matter!

    We have been lead to believe that tension in church is bad. I believe that it’s time to call the church back together. I believe that when we chose to take our flocks and submit them to one another in submission to Jesus, who longs to break down walls that separate, that we will see God do amazing things.

    I hear a lot of friends openly wonder why the American Evangelical church is not gaining more ground in our society. And yet we, as American Evangelicals, refuse to deal with our personal and institutional sins.

    I’ll quiet this rant by proposing a question. Friend, I covet your response.

    If there were a young friar in a monestary today composing 95 charges of sin against the Evangelical Church, what would he nail to the Wittenberg Door?