Month: February 2005

I know you’re not suppose to watch your retirement account… But when it is going up and up it is so much fun! I’ve added about 10% so far this year to my IRA’s value. I can only hope it manages to hold that gain through the year.

a mix of good and bad
As I’ve mentioned a few times here on All Blogs, my church is in the midst of hiring a new senior pastor. I’ve known for a few weeks how serious this search had become, but I wasn’t able to talk about it until now.

But it is now official that the church will be voting to hire our interim pastor as the full time senior pastor this February 27th.

While this is a good thing for the church, it will remain to be seen if it is a good thing for me professionally. I have been faithful to this church for the last 14 months. I have helped keep things afloat and helped the church remain viable in our community. But it is also a reality that none of that matters now. In another 2 weeks I will be seen as a resource that the new pastor can decide to throw away at his good pleasure or keep if he wants. But since I am an expense that he may think he doesn’t need… Anything can happen.

the depressing reality
For all of this time I have labored here and it could all go to waste. I know that, I accepted that risk… In fact I embraced it… But it comes at a super high price. I have been faithful to the job I’ve been called to do and it is scary to think that this guy could dump me. But it’s also my role. When I stayed through this transition I knew that the new guy was capable of dumping me. It won’t matter that the people of the church like me or that they can see the ministry I am doing with the students… If he wants to dump me they will support him and not me.

the naive hope
Since I know this guy, I know that it seems unlikely for that to happen. I may have to learn to wear some new hats but I may be able to survive this transition. I hope so. We really like it here and we can see that we have been effective. But with this new person will come new pressures. I know that he may become infatuated with numbers. There will be a push to build, and with that will come the pressures to get cost effective. That is my angle. Currently, my ministry touches 75% of the people who are paying the bills here. I feel pretty strongly that I pay for myself… But we will see if he feels that way.

time will tell
The next 30-90 days will be scary. Dear God, allow me to continue serving the adolescents of Romeo and their families. Amen

We woke up this morning and promptly fed chocolate to the children in celebration of this Hallmark holiday.

Like most of us out there, my holy hatred for Valentines Day is rooted in my childhood. I always hated getting and sending those terrible little notes and I always got my feelings hurt when the one I really wanted a special Valentine from was always signed with just her name.

Hating Valentines Day along with me this year are my three Tuesday morning bible study girls, the giggling gals. They hate Valentines Day more than I do… They have even announced to their parents that they plan on being protestant nuns. That’s 3 fewer girls I have to worry about getting pregnant! The more the merrier.

p.s. Yep, I will be getting the little lady something for Valentines Day. (Even though I hate the day with my life!) She wants a watch and I will get her a watch.

I have two thoughts for this post, both related to a drought. And both droughts I see ending soon.

The spiritual drought
Apparently fasting hasn’t been just on my eyes as the sermon this morning was all about fasting. I had planned on fasting on Monday’s beginning tomorrow, but instead I will accept the fasting challenge from the message and makes Tuesday nights to Wednesday evenings my time to fast as a community. I couldn’t echo more the sentiments of this mornings sermon… if we expect God to do radical things in Romeo, we must worship God in a radical way. (Ala a famous Billy Graham stump sermon from the 60s.)

The pastoral drought
Just a couple of hours ago the church body learned that the search committee is recommending someone as the next senior pastor at the church. (This isn’t a surprise to me at all) In 2 hours the deacons, trustees, and myself will meet with this person to officially begin his candidacy. I know the man well, and while I can’t say who it is just yet, I have little reservations about him being my pastor, friend, or boss. I do have a couple of major concerns that I will be broaching with the appropriate people. There is no way to do this in the group we have meeting tonight… But I will be playing along and helping to guide the conversation the best that I can. Isn’t church polity fun?

If you are just passing by, check out this link… it will make you giggle and prove once again that not all youth pastors are as boring as I am.

Baby Got Book

If you are easily offended, just look away… or better yet watch it, laugh, and then scold me. (I’ll know you really like it!)

the Reality:
That might look like a cocky title to an entry, but I have been learning more and more that this is true. It has been something that I have gradually gotten used to. It’s not so much that I look at myself as important but that others are saying that I am important to me. I guess, since I know myself and know how unimpressive I am, I am not sure how to deal with this reality… but it seems to be the case.

the Proof:
I’ll cite three examples from the last 72 hours:

1. My co-teachers of my ministry are too embarrassed to teach when I am around. They are god teachers, a couple of them even teach for a live, but they have told me that compared to how I teach they feel inadequate.
2. I was IMing a student this week and she told me that the things I am teaching her in Bible study and at Light Force are changing her life. The more I tried to pass this off the more it became clear that she was convinced that when I spoke, she had to listen.
3. People whom I don’t know or have come to Light Force once are coming back because what I have taught them has helped them. A case in point, this past week we talked about infatuation vs. Love on Wednesday night. I felt it was one of my more inadequate talks of all time… But I have heard that this student not only learned from what I taught, but has since come to realize that her relationship with her boyfriend is more an infatuation than anything else.

my Fleeing ways

In all honesty, my instinct is to run from this calling. Every core of my being screams “PA, you are a mess, who are you to speak truth into someone’s life?” To be honest, I want to run from this. It scares the crap out of me that anyone would look to me to find God. Not because I don’t know the Lord but because I feel inadequate and completely unholy to the belly of my soul.

more Reality

So why don’t I just quit ministry? What keeps me here is two fundamental facts about what I am doing. First, I know that it is not my teaching that people are responding to but the awesome power of the Word of God. Second, I know God wants me here in Romeo doing this work. Why else would I still be here?

Today I am gone all day. I am taking the boys of Light Force to Cabelas in Dundee, MI. If you’ve never been or never heard of the place… It is the world’s largest reseller of hunting and camping equipment. It is the largest tourist attraction in the state of Michigan.

I actually don’t like hunting stuff, but I like to look at guns and I like hunting and fishing stuff. But the real deal for me is spending a lot of quality time with the young men of Light Force.

Of course, another thing I like about Cabelas is the wild game they serve in the cafeteria. That’s cool too.

There are times a youth pastor when your whole life can be summed up in a picture. This is one of them.

I don’t normally do gross games, but I felt the upcoming Valentines Day screamed for a game like I Hate Valentines Day! This was step one of 3. Teams had to dunk their heads in jello for 6 letters. Step two was using those 6 letters to come up with a four letter word. Once the students got the right for letter word they received an envelope. With the letter they found inside the envelope they had to write down 30 words using that letter.

It was a fun game, but it isn’t something I will be repeating any time soon.

For a little while now I’ve been trying to figure out the best way to officially make my blog part of my ministry. The reality is that I have never intended this blog to be a ministry blog. (One that is meant to be read by the people of my church.) So this left me with a dilemna… should I open this one up and completely change how I write here or should I just launch a different one for the purpose of blogging to the parents, adults, and students of my ministry?

So… I launched Let’s Be Intentional yesterday afternoon. It is a WordPress based site that will be housed on the churches domain. I will launch one for the new senior pastor as well as soon as all of that is official.