Month: September 2011

  • Grip change

    As a high school golf coach sometimes you have to help your students make major changes to their golf game in order for them to improve. 

    Young, gifted, long-hitting golfers typically have a lot natural talent but have habitual bad technique. Maybe they are so flexible and have such amazing hand-eye coordination from baseball that they don’t have to take the club back at a consistent angle or keep their plant foot steady because they can instinctively make those corrections without even thinking about it at 115 miles per hour. By hitting thousands of balls on the range they have learned bad ways to hit the ball far. And their game is built on bad technique.

    Those bad habits have lead to them to hit the ball a million miles in every direction. But that distance matters so much that they are far better than their peers with better technique.

    The most common change you have to make is to the grip. Most typically young (right-handed) golfers have a strong right hand. (The left hand in the correct position, but the right hand is completely under the club, nearly useless on the backswing.) This allows most of their power to come from a strong left hand and the right hand whipping the club forward at the last second to generate maximum power and spin.

    As a result, they make the golf team on power, raw talent, and likely a decent touch around the green. And a very good freshmen will make the JV squad or even the varsity squad on this raw talent because they can muscle their way around the golf course.

    But as a coach you know that the strong right hand won’t take them consistently near par– a score which will secure them at the top level of the varsity. For 9 holes they might make it to the low 40s or the occasional 39. But to get down closer to par they are going to have to hit it straight more often and with a strong grip that will be impossible.

    So, in the middle of an active season their freshmen or sophomore year, you need to start working on their grip for their junior and senior year.

    It’s frustrating for the golfer because the change means they are less competitive. Their scores go from the low 40s to the high 40s or even into the 50s. (Scores they likely haven’t seen since 6th grade) They lose distance as they start swinging the club on a better plain, at a better angle, and the swing feels much less violent. The ball ends up places on the course they’ve never been before.

    Frustration sets in.

    And they start losing matches. Maybe falling from top of the JV squad down to the the freshmen team. Players they know they are more talented than start beating them.

    It’s a test of their self-discipline.

    Bobby Jones on GolfA grip or a swing change can take months of practice to master before it starts to pay off. It can take a lot longer if the golfer lets old habits sneak in to remain competitive. In front of the coach or on the range they will hold the club properly. But when they need to tee off on a par 5 they will switch the grip to try to power it down the fairway… and wild things begin to happen because they don’t feel natural in that swing anymore either.

    It might seem like a little thing but if you make a dramatic grip change you have to concentrate just to hit the ball squarely. I’ve even seen players completely whiff when you first introduce the change. What used to be instinctive and feel completely natural now feels completely foreign.

    As the coach you have to constantly encourage them during this change. “It will pay off. Don’t let old habits sneak in. It will feel more natural if you keep practicing it. You’ll be a better player if you stick to it.”

    What you learn as a coach is that the difference between being good enough to make the team and good enough to make the all-conference team isn’t just talent. It’s the ability to practice correctly, stick to making hard changes, and to be coachable through those changes in order to realize your potential.

    Life is the same way

    A lot of my success has come because of bad habits. But, just like a young golfer, I’ve had to learn that those bad habits have plateaus for my success. I can be successful to-a-point with the talents I have. The hard reality is that most of my long-term success hasn’t just come from bad habits or talent– it’s come from working hard to get past bad habits, and intentionally taking some steps back in order to learn the skills and techniques to go 3 steps ahead.

    The same is true for you. The habits and skills you have today will only lead you to the success you know. In order to succeed further you’ll need to correct bad habits, rely less on talent and more on proven techniques. Most importantly you’ll need to remain coachable.

    Just like in golf, success is a mental game. You’ll need to push through the frustration of taking a step backwards in order to take 3 steps forward.

  • The Marin Foundation Featured on BBC

    1. Heart and Soul: God and Gays: Bridging the Gulf     

    To play the audio, click the play button

    I have huge respect and admiration for the work of Andrew Marin and The Marin Foundation. Their ministry is simple– build bridges between the LGBT community and the evangelical community.

    While Andy hasn’t been as active on the Christian speaking circuit as he was in 2008-2009, this year the influence of The Marin Foundation has stretched into high levels of government and education here in the US and around the world.

    Recently, Andrew was featured on BBC World Service show, Heart and Soul, all throughout the UK and around the world. In this 28 minute segment, you’ll hear from Andy, the history of The Marin Foundation, and their work in Chicago and around the world.

    Here’s the source for the audio.

  • Guy on a buffalo

    Like that? Here’s episode 2.

    ht to Andrea

  • The OTHER other side

    A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him.Luke 10:31-33

    Sunday afternoon we left our campsite and intentionally turned the wrong way on highway 243. It’s a winding, scenic route that goes from Idylwild to Banning through the San Bernadino National Forest. Near the peak, at about 6000 feet above sea level, we spotted a vista point where we decided to stop for a picnic and take some pictures above the clouds.

    It was a perfect day and we were in high spirits exploring the rugged terrain of eastern Riverside County.

    I pulled over into the lonely turnoff parking lot and the McLane clan piled out of the car to scout a place for our impromptu meal. We raced out onto a giant patio in the sky and found a tree with some shade perfect for our intentions. The view was amazing and stretched far off into the horizon.

    Paul and I went back to the truck to grab our cooler.

    As I was pulling the cooler over the gate I heard the roar of a motorcycle engine coming up the hill. The driver downshifted which made the high performance engine whine a wheezing exhale, followed by the screech of tires. We turned our heads the other way as he flew by in a cloud of grey smoke. Then the bike dumped on its side and the rider skidded across the pavement, tumbling to a stop about 25 feet later. His shoe landed right next to us and his bike bounced off of the parking lot, over the curb, smashing into a concrete barrier before flying up into the bushes.

    I looked at Paul. Paul looked at me. “Did that just happen?”

    He got up in a fit of cuss words. Throwing his gloves and ripping off his helmet. Kicking at and punching the air in anger. A few seconds later 5 of his friends on equally powerful, more prone, motorcycles pulled up. He was clearly not horrifically injured but in pain nonetheless.

    Dazed, bloodied, humbled, his excuses quickly turned into confession. He was going too fast, trying to show off, and now he was going to pay the price with his body & his precious bike.

    Not knowing what to do I picked up his shoe and walked it over to him.

    “Um, here’s your shoe dude. You were pretty lucky to not go over that cliff. Are you OK?”

    He didn’t really know if he was OK but told me he was fine. I gave him his shoe and started walking down the path to my family.

    When I saw Kristen I said, “Some idiot on a motorcycle dumped his bike in the parking lot. That was CRAZY!” Paul was stoked. He’d never seen anything like it. Neither had I. Neither one of us knew what to do with our nervous energy. It was terrifying and exhilarating at the same time.

    When I put the cooler down and opened it up I just couldn’t escape the reality that I should do something. How could I possibly see that accident and then a minute later sit down to eat a peanut butter & jelly sandwich with my family? What kind of man would do that?

    “I guess I should go do some first aid. That dude is pretty banged up.”

    I went back to the truck and dug out my first aid kit and some bottles of water. He and his friends were standing around not really knowing what to do. They shared some laughs and recalled what they had seen. One of them actually captured the whole thing on his GoPro and was joking about putting it on YouTube.

    “Hey dude, I’m not a doctor but I do have a first aid kit. Want to clean up those cuts?”

    And so it began. Before I knew Ryan’s name he dropped his pants and we started cleaning his road rash. His knee and thigh were scrapped up pretty bad. His shoulder bore the same fate.

    “Do you think you could clean up my cuts, too? I fell a couple miles back.” Another young man walked up to me showing me his gnarly wrist, probably broken.

    “Yeah, let’s clean that up. You don’t want to get it infected.” About two minutes later he too dropped his pants to show me his knee, oozing with blood and gravel. His damage was actually worse than the other guy. He said, “I’m supposed to work tomorrow. Do  you think I’ll be OK?”

    “I don’t know. But you should get an x-ray for your wrist and a couple of stitches… because I can see your knee cap.”

    For about 15 minutes I helped these two guys clean up their road rash. Some water to wash it off, some gauze to clean it out, some disinfectant, and more gauze taped over to keep it clean.

    We made small talk about motorcycling and their other accidents and the thrill of why they do it. I didn’t talk much, just listened to their stories and got them patched up. I told them I was sorry this had happened to them and hoped that they made it home OK. (His bike was totaled) A few more bottles of water for everyone and we parted ways.

    It just so happened that we stopped there. And it just so happened that I had a truck full of supplies from our first aid kit. Clearly, this moment had been orchestrated in advance, right?

    The Parable of the Good Samaritan and You

    Luke 10 is one of those passages that stinks to teach as a religious leader because as you’re teaching it you realize that you are the goat in the joke. Jesus sets up the story that the priest and the Levite mess it up while the outcast gets it right. His point is that religious people are often so worried about doing their religious things that they forget to love their neighbors as themselves.

    But when you are teaching it in front of people your minds rushes with times where you were exactly that priest or that Levite, too busy and self-important to do something so basic.

    It’s one of the most convicting passages of Scripture you’ll ever teach.

    For every 100 Ryan’s I encounter I only get it right 1 or 2 times. (And here I am writing about that one time I get it right to make a point? See what I mean? I’m such a hypocrite sometimes.)

    It wasn’t until later in the drive, with the accident miles behind us, that it sunk in.

    The religious leader who asked the question which started Jesus on his parable? I wonder if he changed? I wonder if the next time he saw someone injured on the side of the road if he stopped to help? I wonder if he made a conscious effort to stop being a religious snob and start being a person who actually cared about God’s people more than he cared about looking like he cared about God’s people?

    For self-reflection: How will I slow down from my “important religious stuff” enough to notice the man on Jericho’s road? And what am I going to do about Jericho’s road? (It’s a place where people get beat up while travelling.)

  • Three types of busyness

    The other day Doug Fields wrote about battling busyness in ministry and offered these 6 action steps.
    1. Declare war on busyness
    2. Go public
    3. Clean the piles
    4. Go to bed earlier
    5. Journal to find the “yes”
    6. Quit lying to yourself

    This is such a crucial topic. As I unpacked these action steps I sliced and diced a particular segment of the argument.

    Forgive the introspection. But I want to dive deeper. Specifically, I think there are three different types of busyness in my life.

    1. Seasonal busyness. When I was a youth pastor FT, that was September & December. September because we launched everything, December because it was Christmas and that’s always crazy in a church. Every type of career faces these… I think they are pretty normal.
    2. Legitimate busyness you just have to push through. This last season was like that for me. Summer 2011 will go down as my most busy ever. But it might also go down as the biggest season of blessing our family has ever experienced. God blessed our socks off for no good reason. It’s been my task just to keep up.
    3. Illegitimate busyness. Where I’m staying busy to hide from something else OR looking crazy busy so people think I’m important.

    As I peal back the onion one more layer and look at busyness types 1 & 2– Pride isn’t the right word for describing how I feel about these. But there’s a certain level of satisfaction in pushing through something and acknowledging hard work for what it is.

    Then there is #3. For me, that’s where the shame and accountability come into play because I can convince myself that I am so busy for such a good purpose. I’m thankful I have friends in my life who call my crap. I try to label 3 as 1 & 2 sometimes… but a true friend knows the difference and doesn’t let me get away with it.

    One thing I know about busyness. I hate when people start a conversation with: “I know you’re busy, but…” I always want to reply by saying, “I’m not hat busy, really.” But then I always wonder… “Why do I look so busy? What is it about my demeanor that makes people think I’m busy even if I’m not?”

    What do you think? Are there legitimate and illegitimate types of busyness? Or am I just trying to slice/dice this to justify my behavior? 

  • Mini-Vacation

    Fried eggI’m fried.

    The past 4 months were exhilarating and exhausting at the same time. Here’s a summary of the stuff I’ve been up to.

    • We changed churches
    • I helped launched 2 businesses, mountains of paperwork and 27 trips to the bank, and hundreds of hours of “other crap.”
    • I wrapped up 3+ years of time with Youth Specialties, working like crazy to “finish strong.” (See the bullet point above, that’s a phrase I now don’t want to hear until 2025.)
    • McLane Creative launched 2-3 major sites for clients.
    • The Youth Cartel launched 3-4 major sites for clients.
    • I wrote several very important articles including the feature for the Nov/Dec edition of Immerse Journal.
    • I built new sites for McLane Creative, The Youth Cartel, my blog & Marko’s blog.
    • Started a whole slew of initiatives for The Youth Cartel
    • Put together tons and tons of proposals for The Youth Cartel & McLane Creative
    • Done initial work on the first major projects for these two businesses.
    • Found a new office.
    • Bought lots of really expensive software & hardware.
    • Gosh, I need a nap before I finish this list. There’s way more.

    The last 4 months have felt like a years worth of work– most of which I was consumed by having a full-time job at YS and  trying to do the rest at night.

    Normally we vacation for at least a week in the summer. But the summer of 2011 that didn’t happen.

    So we’re kicking off fall 2011 with a little mini-vacation, camping in the forests above Palm Springs.

    Our family has a rule that it’s not vacation if daddy brings a computer. So all of our electronics are staying home. Macbooks, iPads, Nintendo DSs… and I’m even turning off the email function on my phone. We’re disconnecting for a few days and heading for the hills to recupperate. And if this isn’t enough? We’ll do it again.

    My brain is on empty. My soul is weary. And I’m the kind of tired a good nights sleep won’t fix. We need to get away… and read, rest, play… do nothing.

    So that’s the deal.

    Friday morning we’re packing up a big ole` pick-em-up truck (thanks Brian!). All of us. Mom, dad, Megan, Paul, Jackson, and Stoney. And we’re going to enjoy some pure California fun.

  • A 6 ton satellite fell on my house and all I got was this lousy t-shirt

    As of 9:30 p.m. EDT Sept. 22, 2011, the orbit of UARS was 110 mi by 115 mi (175 km by 185 km). Re-entry is possible sometime during the afternoon or early evening of Sept. 23, Eastern Daylight Time. The satellite will not be passing over North America during that time period. It is still too early to predict the time and location of re-entry with any more certainty, but predictions will become more refined in the next 24 hours.

    Follow the drama at NASA

    Have you ever wanted a mid-morning snack and heard the sudden crack of a sonic boom only to look up and see a 6 ton flaming satellite careening towards your house at terminal velocity?

    Yeah, me neither.

    But it looks like one lucky winner just might experience this later today.

    The sky is falling– literally. 

    It turns out Ronald Reagan was right all along. We really do need a series of satellites to shoot down threats from space before they do damage to the American people. As it turns out, we didn’t need that to protect against Russian ICBMs. We needed it as protection from our own space junk.

    See that crater over there? 

    — Yeah.

    That was Joe Johnson’s house.

    — Really? What happened? All I see is a pond with a chimney sticking out of it. 

    Satellite fell on him. 

    — Huh.

    Question: If a satellite falls on your house do you get to keep it? 

  • Behold, unexpected joy

    There is a baby boy on the floor next to me, crawling around the living room, exploring. Everything in this babies life is defined by one emotion: Joy.

    We hold him but his joy is something you behold. It sneaks up on you and slaps you when you least expect it. Bam! Joy, joy, joy, and more joy.

    Jackson’s joy tackles you down and forces you to smile. It doesn’t matter how bad he feels or that he’s cutting a tooth or that he’s hungry or has a dirty diaper. He flashes a smile and a hug which melts you faster than a snowflake on the hood of a hot car.

    There is something about Jackson, something deep inside of him that sets him apart. I can’t wait to watch him grow up so we can discover more and more why God gave him this radiant, magnetic joy.

    Here’s the thing: JT is a baby. There really is something distinctive to him. But imagine how much joy radiates from the Father? In Him we find delight, which supersedes joy. (Psalm 1)

    Allow joy to radiate on you today. Allow yourself to be drawn magnetically to the Lord. It’s a choice, it’s something you allow in your life, it’s a filter on your soul you consciously remove.

  • Deliver us from evil

    If you hang out in Churchland you’ll almost never hear of evil in the church. We cover it up with elder approved statements, letters, forced resignations, cheesy happy, clappy worship songs, smiling sermons, and a heavy dose of denial.

    I didn’t have to search very hard for those headlines above. All I did was search the term “youth pastor” on Google News; these were on the first page of results.

    Evil exists everywhere, of course. Just because people are Christians doesn’t mean they are absent of sin in their lives. But it boils my blood that the profession I love leads headlines with evil instead of the good that we do.

    My point isn’t that youth pastors are evil. Far from it. My point is that we can’t live in denial that there is evil. 

    People in your ministry deal with real evil every day. There is real evil in your life. There are people who are out to destroy you. There are forces at work through the tides of relationships that can elevate or destroy you. There are real temptations and moments of failure which can lead your life into horrible directions.

    Life is full of temptresses and tempests.

    And we need deliverance from this evil every day. And we need to lead people in a way that seeks deliverance from evil, real evil in their lives.

    Because at the end of the day– living a happy, clappy, smiley, existence of denial may just be enabling evil. 

    Our Father, which art in heaven,
    Hallowed be thy Name.
    Thy Kingdom come. 
    Thy will be done in earth, 
    As it is in heaven.
    Give us this day our daily bread.
    And forgive us our trespasses,
    As we forgive them that trespass against us. 
    And lead us not into temptation, 
    But deliver us from evil. 
    For thine is the kingdom,

    The power, and the glory,

    For ever and ever.

    Amen.

  • Join the Sticky Faith book club

    To join us, buy the book and read chapter one by October 10th

    “Lord, make me a better dad.” 

    Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8

    This is my daily prayer. Literally, it is my prayer every day. Why? Because there have been times when I’ve not been a good dad.

    Here’s a painful reality that I’ve had to face: There have been times when I’ve cared more about ministering to other people’s kids while neglecting the needs of my own kids. And as I’ve shared that painful reality I’ve come to realize that I’m not alone in that struggle. It’s a common problem among ministry families and one I think we need to address together.

    Your invitation

    Kristen and I would like to invite you to join us in an online book club here on my blog where we will be reading, writing about, and wrestling through a brand new book. It’s called, Sticky Faith: Everyday ideas to build lasting faith in your kids by Kara Powell & Chap Clark.

    About Sticky Faith

    Nearly every Christian parent in America would give anything to find a viable resource for developing within their kids a deep, dynamic faith that ‘sticks’ long term. Sticky Faith delivers. Research shows that almost half of graduating high school seniors struggle deeply with their faith. Recognizing the ramifications of that statistic, the Fuller Youth Institute (FYI) conducted the ‘College Transition Project’ in an effort to identify the relationships and best practices that can set young people on a trajectory of lifelong faith and service. Based on FYI findings, this easy-to-read guide presents both a compelling rationale and a powerful strategy to show parents how to actively encourage their children’s spiritual growth so that it will stick to them into adulthood and empower them to develop a living, lasting faith. Written by authors known for the integrity of their research and the intensity of their passion for young people, Sticky Faith is geared to spark a movement that empowers adults to develop robust and long-term faith in kids of all ages.

    Each Monday we will write a brief reflection and some questions specifically geared for ministry families. (It’s open to anyone, obviously all Christians are in ministry to some extent, right?)

    And then, just like a book club, we’ll open it up for discussion.

    How long will it last?

    The book is 8 chapters long, each week we will discuss a single chapter. Don’t worry– the chapters are pretty short.

    Here’s the schedule:

    October 10th – The not-so-sticky faith reality

    October 17th – The sticky gospel

    October 24th  – Sticky identity

    October 31st – Stick faith conversations

    November 7th – A sticky web of relationships

    November 14th – Sticky justice

    November 28th – A sticky bridge out of home

    December 5th – The ups and downs of the sticky faith journey

    Why this book?

    1. There are a lot of great books out there for parents, but this one is grounded in brand new research conducted by Fuller Youth Institute. Then they took their findings through a series of tests and dry runs to make sure that their learnings correlated. And only then did they boil it down into transferable principles. I think that sets it apart from most.
    2. Like I shared at the beginning, I think parents in ministry sometimes lose sight of their own kids. I’d like to help bring the focus on learning how to raise our own kids for a bit.
    3. I want to be a better dad. Kristen and I don’t have it all figured out. And we’d like the opportunity to learn from others so we can parent better.
    4. Kara Powell, Chap Clark, Brad Griffin, and the folks at FYI are amazing people. They have poured their heart and soul into this project. And I would love to see their hard work benefit families in my life.

    How do I join the book club?

    1. Fill out the form below so we can follow-up with you along the way.
    2. Buy the book; read the first chapter by October 10th. (It’d be great if couples joined us!)
    3. Agree to participate in the discussion and contribute to the group. (Guest posts totally encouraged!)

    Where do I buy the book?

    • Amazon.com – paperback or Kindle (I make 6% commission if you buy it this way)
    • DougFields.com – Pretty sure Doug is selling it cheaper than anyone, I don’t make anything from the sale but I did build his store, isn’t that cool?
    [gravityform id=2 name=Jointhe Sticky Faith online book club ajax=true]

    Have questions? Leave a comment.

    Q1: I’m not in ministry, can I be in the book club? Absolutely! Just know that we’ll be gearing the discussion towards ministry families.