birthdays

I may be the only person under the age of 40 in the whole world who doesn’t care too much for his birthday. It’s not that I dislike presents, not at all. I don’t even mind the attention too much. I suppose what I do not like is the “exposure of it all.”

Everyone here at the church knows it’s my 28th birthday. And if they don’t, then as soon as they come in the door they are told about it. Bah humbug! I’d much rather it just be another day where perhaps I got to play a little more golf or maybe a nice gift from Kristen, but I just don’t like the whole world wanting to sing “happy birthday.”

If I wanted to get all Freudian about it, I’d say that I am repressing anger towards my parents for not caring about my birthday growing up. (Though they may disaggree with this sentiment… I’ll revise it to say after my 4th birthday, they forgot.) Sure, it was painful for me to find my birthday card in July in the bottom of dad’s truck. Unsigned and with a post-it on it that read “don’t forget!” He always forgot. Then there were the countless gifts that were last second, the “oh crap… it’s Adam’s birthday, pick up something on the way home” gifts. Worse yet, the “what do you want for your birthday?” presents. Then they just opt out for the gift card every time. What about actually thinking about it? Does that ever cross anyones mind?

Or I could say that my birthday is too weird for me. I don’t like the singing to a person. I could get all spiritual about that, but in all seriousness any birthday I have is a gift from God. I don’t deserve to be here.

Mostly, I’m trying to find the joy in my birthday mostly vicariously through Megan. She legitimately is excited that it’s my birthday. She loves birthdays! It’s hard to not be excited around that little girl. She is such a joy.

I suppose that the moral of the story is simply that I like to “fake it” on my birthday. It’s fun for other people, perhaps because they are secretly thinking of their own happy days, or perhaps because they are one year closer to me dying (ha!) or maybe, even they are excited because they like me. Too much angst for me.

In other news, dropped a legitimate 39 on the South back today. 7 pars, a boget and a forgetable double. I’m looking forward to my time at the Famers Classic this weekend. I hope it will be nice weather.