here’s Paul with Autumn at the church. Autumn has absolutely saved our summer with her loads of help. 

megan and mom at vbs… isn’t it great when a picture captures something that happens hundreds of times a day? 

megan at a 4th of July celebration 

not quite a self portrait… but it sure looks like a normal day of me coming to work. 

It seems that nothing captivates my imagination more on the YS forums than a good discussion about work conditions. The latest things I’ve gotten into have to do with salaries and leaving. Here is my post from the “how to leave a church” thread.

Here are some themes that come up time and again here. What do I do when I am asked to resign? Tell the truth. We’ve heard many horror stories about people being asked to “mask the reason they are leaving” as if it were their idea to quit. No one should sell themselves out. If you’re fired… Accept the offer to resign but make it clear who initiated it in your letter. If it’s mutual… Fine. If you initiated it… Fine. Just be honest about it. Should I ask for severance? Yes. If you are being asked to leave or are fired for something other than moral failure… Compensation is normal. Do I get to keep ____? Only if it was purchased from your pay package or were directly told you can have it. (Book allowance, software, etc.)Should I run an event/contact students after my departure? The rule of thumb is “once you leave, leave for good.” Hand off all projects and sever regular ties with students. Don’t be rude… But you need to get out of these relationships. Should I worship elsewhere? Yes. Should I leave town? If you aren’t from the area… Leave as soon as is appropriate. Am I done in youth ministry? Only if you’ve really screwed up. Getting fired isn’t the end of the world. In fact, some churches might think you’ve learned a thing or two by getting canned. Chin up… Life will continue. Should I be the whistle blower? No. Surrender it to God. If you’ve done this for a while… You will get stabbed in the back. You will get hurt. There will be times that injustice will be heaped on top of you. You will be vilified after you leave. This is a good time to ask yourself “who do I work for anyway?”Should my departure be about me? As was posted so well before. The one thing that will be remembered about you is how you left. If you leave a classy ministry in a tasteless way… You will be remembered as tasteless. But even if you are canned for doing something really stupid and you leave in a very classy, complementary and encouraging way… You will leave that ministry with a lot of dignity. Who can I turn to? There are some refuges in this world. If you don’t have one… Get one before it happens to you. If you’ve been brought somewhere away from home you must keep in mind that you may need to escape. Have a plan. Where will you go? Who will you live with? How will you get there? Where will the money come from? What are the questions I need to ask? On and on and on. Take the time now to have an exit strategy! Start by asking yourself these three questions:- If I were to get fired now, how could I make my departure bring glory to God?- If I were to get fired now, who would I need to talk to first?- If I were to get fired now, how could I protect my family?OK? I hope this clears up some of the basic things that have been talked about over the last few months.

10 bucks says all of this comes back up within the next 2 weeks. The beginning of the fall is one of the highest stress times for a youth pastor. New stuff is beginning and therefore needs to be promoted. Expectations are usually very high. Couple that with the reality that fall isn’t the best time of the year for ministry and you have a recipe for disaster. The only more stressful time of the year for a youth pastor is late spring as churches get a little loopy and a lot of people tend to get canned.

I hope this isn’t a sign of things to come. But I never like losing. The only thing I dislike more than losing is getting my butt kicked.

We took the 3 best sophomores and the 2 worst juniors to the Warren Woods-Tower Invitational today to play 18 holes at http://www.oakridgegolf.com where they proceeded to play against 18 other Macomb County teams. Granted, this was our jv versus all the rest of the areas varsity teams. However, we are better than we played today. Of the 4 scores we kept, only one of them was below 90. The winning team from DeLaSalle HS had all four of their scores in the 70s.

The spin on it is that it was good exposure for these students. Since we were so tough last year and the tournament didn’t know were were brining our jv, they lumped us together with the best kids around. The other 3 teams in my groups foursomes finished 1st, 2nd and 3rd respectively. If we had brought our varsity than clearly that would have been the group to watch out for. So, it was painful to see these kids get pounded and finish 16 out of 19 teams invited. Had these students had played their averages, we should have finished in a respectable 9th place.

I am still waiting to hear how things went for our varsity team. They were across the state at the Zeeland Invitational, which is a showcase of the best teams in the state. In other golfing news we have a whale of a week coming up. Tuesday we will take the 8 best to http://www.golfmsu.msu.edu/ to get a preview of where this years State Finals will be. We will also have another look at it for the conference championship coming up in early October. Hopefully, the guys will be back there a couple of weeks later for the finals. On Wednesday, we have our first official match down at http://www.cherrycreekgolf.com/ against Eisenhower HS followed by a tough match against Rochester Adams HS on Thursday and Friday. Another busy week before school begins 8/31!

I hate to use the phrase “I feel blessed” because it is so cliche`. In fact, it’s just one of those phrases that makes me cringe to hear.

Yet the reality is this. I have been tremendously blessed in the year or so I’ve been here. “What! Things couldn’t have gone worse? The church is shrinking, the wheels seem to be coming off, the pastor and music guy left 3 months after you arrived… How can you be blessed in that job?” That is the argument I have inside myself when I reflect on things. But things here have been fantastic.

Compared the first 12 months here with the first 12 months in Horrorville and you will see a case study in opposites. There I tried to fit in and didn’t. Here I didn’t try to fit in and did. There I absorbed myself in relationships with students. Here those relationships have taken a while to develop. There I tried to force myself onto the school campuses and was shut down. Here I submitted myself to whatever and the doors of the school swung open. There I begged and massaged to get leaders to come, and they didn’t. Here I literally have turned them away, and the ones that are here are incredible. There we had a long standing mission trip with minimal results. Here we had a first time mission trip with maximum results. There we had a board who was very involved and insightful. Here we have a board that just listens and asks “how can we help. There we had no friends and were lonely. Here we’ve found friends who accept us and care for us. There I had a hard time making end roads into outreach level students. Here I’ve been handed an opportunity to reach people doing what I love most. There, the harder I worked and marketed, the fewer kids showed up. Here they just show up, eager to learn. There money was a constant struggle. Here I rarely worry about feeding the kids. There I was lost everywhere I went. Here… Well I still get lost, but it’s easier to find my way. There, each new idea was met with pessimism. Here, new ideas are lapped up. There I was championed for working cross-generational and scorned privately. Here, such work comes easily and is appreciated. There I came with much fanfare and was labeled as a changing force. Here I came and have made change without causing ripples. There it was so forced to teach God’s word, it never felt right. Here I can teach freely and the biblical truths are applied liberally.

All that to say… I must be blessed here. No other word can describe the things we have been able to accomplish here. I cannot wait to see what God has next for us as we get ready to launch our ministry teams and the equipping/winning phase. I am eager to see it happen. I can’t wait to see more students grow in their relationships with the Lord. I can’t wait to see friends leading friends down Romans Road. There is a sense of patient urgency as we approach this new phase of ministry. We recognize that we are poised to do something for God’s glory, yet I do not desire to rush things. I continually am pleased to see individual progress made.

In short… I am blessed to be here in Romeo.

here’s the man… Paul at the beach in Traverse 

megan at the cherry festivals childrens parade… traverse city, MI 

here’s megan on our vacation