Category: Uncategorized

  • junk mail

    The funny thing about the fall season getting ready to kick off is that all the ministries are bulk mailing me to death. I love to see the new products out there. Curriculum, books, worship resources, and more. I am excited to get introduced to these things.

    But a couple of things that drive a guy nuts.

    1. Do I really need 25 copies? I mean, we can make a camera the size of a pill in this universe, but you can’t come up with a way to figure out that one church is getting the same catalogue over and over? Sheesh!
    2. Why now? I’ve had my fall programming decisions done for quite a while. Are they banking on most YP’s being so lazy that we’ll make impulse buys?
    3. What about the money? I know light force is officially strapped for cash this fall. It’s not that I’ve been unwise with our ministries cash… it’s just been an expensive season of exciting things.
    4. Why not spread it out? Do a lot of ministries really go out and buy tons of stuff at the same time? I like to spread my purchases out a little more so I can evaluate what I’m buying and sense if the stuff I bought before was any good.

    I don’t want this to seem like I am ripping on anyone inparticular. But the worst offenders right now are Willow Creek, Word of Life and Youth Specialties. All good organization. All with really lame marketing schemes. (Data dump and pray it works) Maybe it’s just that I like to complain, but in the meantime I sure am sick of tossing all these nice glossy packages!

  • adoption

    This morning in Sunday school we will be talking about “what does it mean to have an adoptive family?” or something like this. As I stare at a room full of 2nd generation Christians I am left in awe that I can never really identify with them.

    There is a significant difference in the faith of a person who has grown up in the church vs. Someone who came to faith outside of their family. Just as I will never know what it has been like all of these years to come to church every week with their families and worship Jesus together, they will also never sit in their parents shoes. Their lives, though Jesus can and will transform them, will never have the same experience of wonder and awe of finding your “true family.”

    In preparing for this morning, I watched the film Antwone Fisher. The story is about a young man who never knew his real family. For his entire life he was raised by people who only looked like they cared about him. Deep inside he always longed for his momma. He wanted someone who just loved him as opposed to the people in his life who only loved him when he was good or just loved him enough to collect a state check. This was proven susynchtly when he turned 18. On that day the state took him to a men’s homeless shelter and left him with. The only people who took care of him all of those years, state-appointed guardians, simply dropped him off at a homeless shelter and gave him $67. Alone in the world, hurt in every direction, he joined the Navy having few other options. The film is really about finding out who you really are. In his quest to forgive people whom he never met and conquer his anger, Antwone goes on a quest to find his family. After searching for a few days he finally comes across people who are kin to him. The following scene, which contrast two life’s choices, is a crystal clear interpretation of real life. On one side, a single mother alone in a housing project. Her long lost boy finally comes to find her and she just sits there, ashamed of herself she stairs blankly at the wall. It is a cold, inhuman response. Antwone presses her for answers and when it is apparent she will not answer his charges he simply states his case and walks away. “I am a good man. I have done a lot of things, I have avoided all the pitfalls that have befell me in this life. I want you to know that I am alive and I love and forgive you for abandoning me.” He stands tall in confronting this woman. His strength in this moment is life altering. On the flip side, Antwone finds his father’s family. People he’s never met or known. They welcome him with open arms. In fact, after a brief meeting he leaves to meet his mother, only to return later to find all of his family. Aunts, cousins, uncles and even the beloved grandmother. Everywhere he turns there are people who want to love him and accept him. We are left with the knowledge that this young man has found family. His lifelong quest to feel like a normal human being has been fulfilled in finding these people. The void once so plain to see, which he filled with anger and violence, can now be filled by something substantive.

    What an incredible contrast for our students today as we show them the truth that as children of God, we are welcomed into that second home. When we receive Christ, our new family kisses us and says “welcome home” and embraces us into the flock. Though we don’t deserve this kind of love, He clears the way for us to be adopted.


  • here’s Paul with Autumn at the church. Autumn has absolutely saved our summer with her loads of help. Posted by Hello


  • megan and mom at vbs… isn’t it great when a picture captures something that happens hundreds of times a day? Posted by Hello


  • megan at a 4th of July celebration Posted by Hello


  • not quite a self portrait… but it sure looks like a normal day of me coming to work. Posted by Hello

  • Employment quandaries

    It seems that nothing captivates my imagination more on the YS forums than a good discussion about work conditions. The latest things I’ve gotten into have to do with salaries and leaving. Here is my post from the “how to leave a church” thread.

    Here are some themes that come up time and again here. What do I do when I am asked to resign? Tell the truth. We’ve heard many horror stories about people being asked to “mask the reason they are leaving” as if it were their idea to quit. No one should sell themselves out. If you’re fired… Accept the offer to resign but make it clear who initiated it in your letter. If it’s mutual… Fine. If you initiated it… Fine. Just be honest about it. Should I ask for severance? Yes. If you are being asked to leave or are fired for something other than moral failure… Compensation is normal. Do I get to keep ____? Only if it was purchased from your pay package or were directly told you can have it. (Book allowance, software, etc.)Should I run an event/contact students after my departure? The rule of thumb is “once you leave, leave for good.” Hand off all projects and sever regular ties with students. Don’t be rude… But you need to get out of these relationships. Should I worship elsewhere? Yes. Should I leave town? If you aren’t from the area… Leave as soon as is appropriate. Am I done in youth ministry? Only if you’ve really screwed up. Getting fired isn’t the end of the world. In fact, some churches might think you’ve learned a thing or two by getting canned. Chin up… Life will continue. Should I be the whistle blower? No. Surrender it to God. If you’ve done this for a while… You will get stabbed in the back. You will get hurt. There will be times that injustice will be heaped on top of you. You will be vilified after you leave. This is a good time to ask yourself “who do I work for anyway?”Should my departure be about me? As was posted so well before. The one thing that will be remembered about you is how you left. If you leave a classy ministry in a tasteless way… You will be remembered as tasteless. But even if you are canned for doing something really stupid and you leave in a very classy, complementary and encouraging way… You will leave that ministry with a lot of dignity. Who can I turn to? There are some refuges in this world. If you don’t have one… Get one before it happens to you. If you’ve been brought somewhere away from home you must keep in mind that you may need to escape. Have a plan. Where will you go? Who will you live with? How will you get there? Where will the money come from? What are the questions I need to ask? On and on and on. Take the time now to have an exit strategy! Start by asking yourself these three questions:- If I were to get fired now, how could I make my departure bring glory to God?- If I were to get fired now, who would I need to talk to first?- If I were to get fired now, how could I protect my family?OK? I hope this clears up some of the basic things that have been talked about over the last few months.

    10 bucks says all of this comes back up within the next 2 weeks. The beginning of the fall is one of the highest stress times for a youth pastor. New stuff is beginning and therefore needs to be promoted. Expectations are usually very high. Couple that with the reality that fall isn’t the best time of the year for ministry and you have a recipe for disaster. The only more stressful time of the year for a youth pastor is late spring as churches get a little loopy and a lot of people tend to get canned.

  • ouch! the golf team is punished

    I hope this isn’t a sign of things to come. But I never like losing. The only thing I dislike more than losing is getting my butt kicked.

    We took the 3 best sophomores and the 2 worst juniors to the Warren Woods-Tower Invitational today to play 18 holes at http://www.oakridgegolf.com where they proceeded to play against 18 other Macomb County teams. Granted, this was our jv versus all the rest of the areas varsity teams. However, we are better than we played today. Of the 4 scores we kept, only one of them was below 90. The winning team from DeLaSalle HS had all four of their scores in the 70s.

    The spin on it is that it was good exposure for these students. Since we were so tough last year and the tournament didn’t know were were brining our jv, they lumped us together with the best kids around. The other 3 teams in my groups foursomes finished 1st, 2nd and 3rd respectively. If we had brought our varsity than clearly that would have been the group to watch out for. So, it was painful to see these kids get pounded and finish 16 out of 19 teams invited. Had these students had played their averages, we should have finished in a respectable 9th place.

    I am still waiting to hear how things went for our varsity team. They were across the state at the Zeeland Invitational, which is a showcase of the best teams in the state. In other golfing news we have a whale of a week coming up. Tuesday we will take the 8 best to http://www.golfmsu.msu.edu/ to get a preview of where this years State Finals will be. We will also have another look at it for the conference championship coming up in early October. Hopefully, the guys will be back there a couple of weeks later for the finals. On Wednesday, we have our first official match down at http://www.cherrycreekgolf.com/ against Eisenhower HS followed by a tough match against Rochester Adams HS on Thursday and Friday. Another busy week before school begins 8/31!

  • i hate the word "blessed"

    I hate to use the phrase “I feel blessed” because it is so cliche`. In fact, it’s just one of those phrases that makes me cringe to hear.

    Yet the reality is this. I have been tremendously blessed in the year or so I’ve been here. “What! Things couldn’t have gone worse? The church is shrinking, the wheels seem to be coming off, the pastor and music guy left 3 months after you arrived… How can you be blessed in that job?” That is the argument I have inside myself when I reflect on things. But things here have been fantastic.

    Compared the first 12 months here with the first 12 months in Horrorville and you will see a case study in opposites. There I tried to fit in and didn’t. Here I didn’t try to fit in and did. There I absorbed myself in relationships with students. Here those relationships have taken a while to develop. There I tried to force myself onto the school campuses and was shut down. Here I submitted myself to whatever and the doors of the school swung open. There I begged and massaged to get leaders to come, and they didn’t. Here I literally have turned them away, and the ones that are here are incredible. There we had a long standing mission trip with minimal results. Here we had a first time mission trip with maximum results. There we had a board who was very involved and insightful. Here we have a board that just listens and asks “how can we help. There we had no friends and were lonely. Here we’ve found friends who accept us and care for us. There I had a hard time making end roads into outreach level students. Here I’ve been handed an opportunity to reach people doing what I love most. There, the harder I worked and marketed, the fewer kids showed up. Here they just show up, eager to learn. There money was a constant struggle. Here I rarely worry about feeding the kids. There I was lost everywhere I went. Here… Well I still get lost, but it’s easier to find my way. There, each new idea was met with pessimism. Here, new ideas are lapped up. There I was championed for working cross-generational and scorned privately. Here, such work comes easily and is appreciated. There I came with much fanfare and was labeled as a changing force. Here I came and have made change without causing ripples. There it was so forced to teach God’s word, it never felt right. Here I can teach freely and the biblical truths are applied liberally.

    All that to say… I must be blessed here. No other word can describe the things we have been able to accomplish here. I cannot wait to see what God has next for us as we get ready to launch our ministry teams and the equipping/winning phase. I am eager to see it happen. I can’t wait to see more students grow in their relationships with the Lord. I can’t wait to see friends leading friends down Romans Road. There is a sense of patient urgency as we approach this new phase of ministry. We recognize that we are poised to do something for God’s glory, yet I do not desire to rush things. I continually am pleased to see individual progress made.

    In short… I am blessed to be here in Romeo.


  • here’s the man… Paul at the beach in Traverse Posted by Hello