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Stardate 73716.6: Nineteenth day of social distancing

Did you ever notice Charles Stanley has a really long index finger? I was thinking about that today. Google it and let me know what you think. Murray had to go to the vet today to get a prescription refilled. He did great. They told me they couldn’t take his temperature because he wouldn’t let them put the thermometer in his butt. They didn’t need to tell me that because I heard him growl at them from the waiting room. I don’t blame you, Murray. Speaking of thermometers, I’m taking my temperature like ten times a day. My thermometer goes in your ear, you count to 5, you press the button, and then for a half second you convince yourself you’ve got COVID-19. Then it turns out you don’t. And then you kind of wish you did have a super mild case just so you could recover and leave the house again. They probably need those kinds of thermometers for dogs. I didn’t read that article in TIME Magazine by NT Wright for several days. The title kind of triggered me. But then I finally did read it and I’m with Tom. We aren’t friends but I hear his friends call him Tom. In my mind we are friends so it’s OK. Tom. Sometimes I think we are just meant to lament and that’s what this strange season is for. I mean, the Aztecs had a real shot at making the Final Four and I was going to take Jackson as a surprise. But now we’ll never know. Mal, Matt, Yanni, Jordan, and KJ are still going to be heroes though. I think “lament” is the Christian word for “sucks.” It laments that March Madness got cancelled. I’m looking forward to tomorrow though. We’re going to have “Church for Youth Workers” again and I don’t think it’s going to lament. 

Current body temperature: 98.3 left ear; 98.4 right ear
Rolls of toilet paper: 2.6 cases (I counted, Tash) 
Number of times I touched my face today: I give up. If I die, I die. 
Supplies: We’re going through a quart of salsa a day. Normal? 
Dollars received from the government: $0 of $3400
Social distancing grade: C+ (Vet and Petco)

By Adam McLane

Kristen and Adam live in the San Diego neighborhood of Rolando with their three children.

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