4 Ways We Hold High School Students Back

Photo by Megan Ann via Flickr (Creative Commons)

In reading Robert Epstein’s book, Teen 2.0, the one thing that fundamentally shifted my thinking is that adults lament about childish behavior while simultaneously funding and celebrating it.

Politely, Epstein says we have infantalized our youth. Maybe we need to take it a step further? We treat our young like pets.

4 Quick Examples to Illustrate that Point

  1. We spend bagillions of dollars on the Rule of Law and Regulation of Teenagers: In the last 40 years we have created an immense amount of laws aimed at regulating behavior of those under 18. We force them to go to school. We regulate where they can go when school is out. We regulate when they can be out. We tell them what they can wear. Who they can be with. What they can ingest or not ingest. Epstein did a study comparing inmates to high school students and found that men in prison have more freedoms. But magically, despite 18 years old not being a significant number in physical or emotional development, we have decided that those over 18 can do whatever they want.
  2. We Celebrate Low Expectations: We have removed adult expectations from high school students. They can’t be bothered to even get out of bed in the summer, right? Forget the fact that physically high school students are near the pinnacle of their strength and can outwork their parents. Forget the fact that the adolescent brain is mostly ready to tackle adulthood, ever seen what happens when a teenage son asks his mom to help him with his physics homework? And forget the fact that teenagers can do amazing things. (Like say, discover a cancer treatment for a high school science fair) Instead of ramping up expectations for them, in our wealth, we remove expectations of productivity. We even limit the ability to have expectations of our high school students. Instead, we slyly whine about our teenage children at home and what they won’t do. Or a post-college student who has moved home but can’t find the right job.
  3. We have an unlimited spending appetite for teenage sexuality: Think of how many billions of dollars are spent annually preventing teen pregnancy? BILLIONS! But not nearly as many billions as are spent celebrating adolescent sex in advertising, television, movies, etc. Our culture has an obsession with adolescent sexuality. It’s taboo. And that taboo drives our spending on both prevention and celebration. Since we’ve labeled high school students as children, this forces a label that their sexual activities as irresponsible. Meanwhile everything in pop culture celebrates adolescent virility and fertility. (Television, music, news media, movies, etc.) Physically, the average 16 year old is completely ready for sex. But if that 16 year old wants to have a serious, long-term relationship? Oh heck no! We need to prevent it. We argue that they aren’t emotionally ready for a sexual relationship. (Hypocritically, we were but deny that even happened. And our great-grandparents married at 16 and had our grandparents at 19. Today’s teen pregnancy tragedy was yesterday’s normal sexual expectation.) Meanwhile, our Christian constructions argue for waiting until marriage… something which we’ve delayed almost 10 years on average in just 100 years! The average first marriage for a woman in the U.S. is now 26.5 years old.
  4. We Spend a Lot Keeping Teenagers Out of the Workplace: Up until the Great Depression most adolescents didn’t finish high school and entered the trades, farming, or a factory to work full-time. For the most part that is now illegal. We’ve regulated the types of and length of employment adolescents can participate in. We’ve created a false expectation that every student should go to college. (A notion our economy cannot support.) But we’ve created a multi-trillion dollar industry called compulsory high school we can’t bear to let go of or adjust in all of its disfunction. Instead, we now expect that students won’t go to work, earn money for their families, or otherwise contribute because they will perpetually get education for things they don’t want to study. We expect them to consume. And we’ve created industries around entertaining them so they have something to do while not working or not learning. (Sports, video games, summer school, camps, etc.)

Is it no wonder why this period of adolescence has extended from 4-5 years in the 1940s to 13-14 years today? 

Maybe it is time we reverse this trend? Maybe we need to start by getting out of the way and allowing adolescents to become adults?


4 responses to “4 Ways We Hold High School Students Back”

  1. Katie Avatar

    I love this Adam! Highschool should be optional just like it is in most other countries. So many kids just do not want to be there and they could be out contributing to the economy if they were allowed, but instead we’re wasting money on truancy cops to chase them down at whatever time wasting activity they’re engaging in instead, usually trouble causing, since teens are hardly allowed to do anything productive besides school. We should be pushing trade schools as a viable alternative to college. Just because someone doesn’t go to college doesn’t mean that they can’t be a productive member of society.

  2. Brian Avatar

    TO reinforce the issue on the college degrees, we treat college as a social/personal awakening period, rather than an educational and vocational training period, and we push students away from “difficult” STEM degrees and towards less in demand degrees, and we create a scenario where full, responsible adulthood is delayed due to crushing student loan debt that is not able to be sustained by an incomplete or not in demand degree. This is even worse when the church pushes young people to go to more expensive private church affiliated schools,and denominational seminaries, and then fails to provide a professional path that has any hope of maintaining 100,000 student loan amounts.

  3. Justin Avatar

    I think you hit the gist of “helicopter” parents with this article. Parents seem to be over-parenting in some areas while exhibiting non-parenting skills where they are actually needed.

    I find your thoughts on sexuality a little confusing though. While parents should help children navigate hormone rages with morality and values at the forefront, culture will generally always speak in opposition to that standard. After re-reading your thoughts here, I think you mean to speak in generality instead of specific beliefs.

    Anyway, good thoughts and definitely something parents should evaluate: How am I parenting (not-parenting)… who’s benefiting for the right reasons?

  4. […] the reason why the American teenager is both the object of our affection and these attacks. We infantilize them while we celebrate […]

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