Category: Christian Living

  • Drink the Kool Aid

    Drink the kool aid – verb, slang term – 1. the action of wholeheartedly buying into the vision of a religious organization, even to a fault. 2. a crude reference to the tragedy of People’s Temple massacre as lead by Jim Jones.

    Last night, Kristen and I watched Undercover Boss, and we giggled that people were really proud to work for Choice Hotels. Now, I actually like their hotels because I like to travel on the cheap. But it was hard to imagine making that company my life’s work. It’s one thing to drink the kool aid for a hotel chain. But it’s another to drink it for a church.

    Let’s face it. Every good organization has some kool aid drinking going on.  Those people have their own language, their own culture, and their own traditions. People inside the organization don’t even see it. But visitors come in as outsiders and walk around wide-eyed, not getting it.

    People drunk on kool aid can be peculiar to be around… but there’s fewer things finer in the world than being happily under the influence of kool aid! I used to get weirded out by this phenomenon… but now I see it a lot differently. I actually think it is kind of beautiful.

    As I talk to folks who work at churches and other Christian organizations I see two distinct types of people:

    1. People who drank deep of the organizations kool aid and are purveyors of it themselves.
    2. People who are too skeptical of all organizations to ever drink the kool aid, therefore wander churches aimlessly looking for the right place to worship or work.

    With these two types of people I guess I have have two different types of advice

    For those drunk on kool aid:

    • Enjoy it! Be happy in Jesus where you are!
    • Every once and a while, come up from your intoxication to make sure your life is balanced (doing stuff outside of your church) and that what your church is up to lines up with the priorities of the Bible.

    For those skeptics afraid to drink deep of kool aid’s fount:

    • It’s crazy to think about, but the early church was full of kool aid drinkers. (Acts 2:15) Sometimes you (really, I mean “we” since I struggle with this) need to stop being über critical and just drink the kool aid to find what you are looking for.
    • Your (and by you, I include myself) inability to drink the kool aid at any religious organization reveals something about your own heart. It’s not that there is something wrong with “them,” it may just be that there is something wrong with you.

    In short: Stay thirsty, my friends.

  • Correlating Poverty to Religion

    Image by Charles M. Blow / New York Times

    “A Gallup report issued on Tuesday underscored just how out of line we are. Gallup surveyed people in more than 100 countries in 2009 and found that religiosity was highly correlated to poverty. Richer countries in general are less religious.”

    Interesting stuff.

    Jesus told the rich man, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me. When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.” Matthew 19:20-21

    Second thought

    I’d really like to see a similar chart correlating the amount of money a religion spends vs. the number of participants per capita. I have a feeling that all of the spending in westernized Christianity doesn’t correlate to increased impact.

    HT to How to Break Anything & New York Times

  • Why aren’t more people good?

    Photo by René C. Nielsen via Flickr (Creative Commons)

    Maybe people don’t like to do good because they haven’t gotten bored with being bad?

    I had this thought while listening to an episode of This American Life called, Superpowers. In one of the stories a researcher spent months going to bars and asking patrons which superpower they would like to have and why.

    Most people either answered that they would like to fly or that they would like to be invisible.

    As the research continued, he discovered that while some people claimed they wanted to fly or to be invisible for the sake of doing good, in actuality… when they were totally honest… they wanted to use their superpower to do things that were naughty. And while flying sounded kind of fun, they really just wanted to be invisible so they could see people naked or steal stuff.

    That’s when I started to wonder: “Maybe people with superpowers do good stuff in the world simply because they’ve gotten bored with being bad?”

    Think about it. The question Barbara Walters always asks a celebrity doing good in the world is always along the same line of reasoning. “Bill, you are the richest man in the world. Why did are you giving it all away?”

    And the answer is a meme. (Poor people like us, we love to hear the meme.) “Well Barbara, you can only own so many houses and meet so many famous people before you realize that there must be something else more meaningful in the world.”

    Yeah, I’m calling them on that.

    You know full-well that someone like Bill Gates or Angelina Jolie or Warren Buffett or Oprah Winfrey are doing so much good in the world only after they have gotten bored doing some really bad stuff. There are only so many Maserati’s one can crash. Or sports teams one can buy. You can only have bald eagle for dinner so many times. You can only buy so many islands. You get the idea.

    Tiger Woods isn’t the first and he won’t be the last suddenly wealthy person to buy a yacht called Privacy and line up 10-20 women.

    You don’t wake up  thinking “I’m bored with this life, I need to commit to doing really good stuff from now on” until you hit rock bottom. You discover that only when your wife shows you a drawer full of Maserati keys. Or you wake up on your bathroom floor surrounded by a bowl of chocolate covered baby sea turtles you didn’t finish, Ben Affleck passed out next to you, a half a pound of cocaine, and a random baby in your closet.

    The first thing you do with newfound wealth is never give back. It’s always consume, consume, consume. And the epiphany comes when you took it too far.

    Back to my reality

    Photo by Rev. Xanatos Satanicos Bombasticos via Flickr (Creative Commons)

    When I think about my own life, my own free time, and the people in my life… each day we are faced with a similar choice. With the time I have available, will I do something productive for society or will I do some consumptive?

    • Do I volunteer more hours serving the people of my church?
    • Do I go play golf?
    • Do I go on a kick-butt vacation?
    • Do I go on a mission trip?
    • Do I attend a charity fundraiser?
    • Do I buy a big plasma TV?

    In the end, given the choice, I do some good in the world and I do some bad. (Not that those things above are horrible or anything. But you get the idea.) But if I’m honest about my motivation for doing either of the things above… it’s more often about mood than principle.

    At the same time, as a leader, I’m often in a position of trying to motivate people to do something for good. And sometimes we are left scratching our heads and wondering, “Why aren’t people busy doing good?”

    Maybe the answer is simple. Maybe they aren’t busy doing good because they haven’t gotten bored being bad?

  • Open Letter to My Former Students

    Like all my friends in youth ministry, I have acquired a growing list of graduates that now scatter the globe. Some are freshmen in college this year, some are married and have cool jobs, and most are kind of in an in-between state. We bump into each other from time-to-time, we comment on one anothers life on Facebook, and I hope they pray for me as I have committed to praying for them. This post is for them.

    Dear former students-

    Dr. Seuss was right! Oh, the places you have gone and the things you have done. Some of you I’ve kept up with pretty closely while most I only get to see little snippets of when you come to town or with what you post on Facebook.

    I just wanted to say to you publicly some things that you need to hear. Life has a way of transforming your dreams into a lame reality and I thought it might be valuable to get a third-party perspective on things.

    Let’s take one more trip up the mountain and dream about what God wants for you.

    The world is yours for the taking

    Seriously, have you looked at your peer group? Life has dealt you a hand that you can easily take advantage of! It’s shocking to me that tomorrows influencers are impressed when snippets of their lives appear on the Fail Blog or Texts From Last Night.

    Never confuse failure for success, no matter how popular it may seem. God has so much more for you in mind.

    If you can rise above that stupidity and soak in as much education and experience as you can in the next 2-3 years you will be head and shoulders above the idiots who walked across the stage with you in high school.

    IQ & money & SAT & GPA mean jack squat right now. It’s all about hard work. Outwork your peer group and you will succeed.

    Tomorrows employers are watching what you are doing today. They want to know… were you one of those knuckleheads we laughed at on Fail Blog? When you explain to them that you were too busy taking care of your classes and holding down a job to pay for college… the doors of opportunity will swing open.

    Take every class seriously. You are paying for it (and will pay for it for the next 10 years) so force your professors to give you their very best. If they don’t perform at their best challenge them to step it up privately. Wrestle through the temptation to blow off classes. Sit in the front 2 rows. Don’t open up your laptop. Take notes the old fashioned way. Do your reading. Turn stuff in.

    Outwork everyone.

    Take every job opportunity seriously. I don’t care if you are making sandwiches at Subway or whipping snot from a kids nose at daycare. Do it for the glory of God. This isn’t a great job market but that doesn’t mean you can’t do great at your job. Remember, he who is faithful with the small things…

    Outwork everyone.

    This stage of life isn’t about friends. It might feel like it should be, but that’s not true. People going places aren’t worried about such things. Look around at your classes today. Your job is to figure out how to rise above all of the people in that room. You don’t have to be smarter than them or get better grades than them… you just have to out position them.

    No one expects anything from your generation. Rise above that and the world is yours.

    Hard work, hard work, hard work. This is the path to success.

    No one is going to hook you up so hook yourself up.

    Grunt out this 5-6 years of your life, act like an adult as soon as possible, and you will reap the rewards for decades to come.

    The church desperately needs you

    I did my best to teach the Word of God to you plainly. Some of you absorbed it and took it seriously, some did not. That’s OK as you picked up more than you think you did.

    Find a local church, get involved, and help them reach their community. It can be the church you grew up attending. It can be a new church. Really, just go to church.

    Trust your instincts on what a healthy church is. It will feel right. It doesn’t have to be big or flashy. It doesn’t have to have a killer program you love or a hot musician. You don’t have to feel comfortable with everything they do and you don’t have to think it’s perfect. My experience is that I feel most negative about a church when I just go and am not involved or giving money. I guarantee you that if you become part of a churches ministries and give what you can, you will feel like you fit in.

    Your church just has to love Jesus, love God’s Word, and have a stupid belief that the Gospel can change lives.

    At the same time, I taught you to think critically about the world around you. This is the most valuable skill needed in the church today. There are enough Christians who are satisfied with reaching a small percentage of the community. Lead bravely wherever you get involved. Remind those at church what the Bible actually says. Hold them to it. The Book of Acts is possible today!

    I pray that you keep believing that every person in your area needs to know Jesus and not to accept 10% as the best you can do. I hope you see things that need to be fixed in this world and step into the responsibility to right wrongs.

    Don’t just be consumers of the Word of God. Be doers.

    Move out as soon as possible

    There is something about your parents generation that wants to hold onto you and baby you as long as possible. Resist that temptation.

    I know it’s nice to have someone take care of you. And I know that its nice to have someone do your laundry.

    Get out. It’s not helping.

    The fastest way to grow up is to leave the nest. I’m not saying you need to hate your parents or that you aren’t supposed to ever see them again. But I am saying that if you are over 18 the best biggest step you can make to being accepted as a “real adult” is to get out.

    The fastest way for you to get dependent is to stop taking their money. Find some people and share an apartment. Pay your own bills. Eat your own Ramen if you have to. You aren’t going to starve… you’re going to get hungry to grow up!

    I’m still here for you

    If you need someone to talk to, I am now and hope to always be here to listen and offer advice. At the very least, know that I continue to pray for you.

    I expect great things from you. As I said when you were in middle and high school– I have a fundamental belief in your generation.

    Be better than my generation. Now. Now. Now.

    — adam

  • Slaying the god of apathy

    I believe this little phrase, God opens and closes doors, has lead to people falsely blaming God for missed opportunities. We put this philosophy of open and closed doors above biblical concepts like perseverance, patience, and long-suffering. Myth: God Opens and Closes Doors

    We live in an apathetic culture.

    Sure, we are a culture of people who can do amazingly good things in times of crisis. We certainly think of ourselves as a culture of people who care for our neighbors and even a caregiver to the nations.

    But we are also a people who have the attention span of the common flea. Just ask the people of the Gulf Coast who still have an oil spill issue. Or people affected by Hurricane Katrina. Or the people of Haiti. Or the people of Darfur. Or the people of [insert the name of any disaster in the last 10 years.]

    Christians are just as guilty of this as non-Christians. It’s a cultural phenomenon.

    We tend to get über excited about something big, obvious, or bleeding but struggle to carry it through beyond triage.

    For example: I’ve never met an incoming freshmen who wasn’t excited to start college. But three weeks into college and they are bored, questioning why they entered school, skipping classes, and living for the next party.

    On and on… we struggle with being excited about things and then when we get into the tedious parts we want to quit because it’s hard or it isn’t immediately fulfilling or it wasn’t what we expected it to be.

    So we quit. We stop caring. We long for something else. We make plans.

    We forget that hard work is a virtue. And perseverance. And over-coming adversity. And all those other words.

    This is why the phrase “God opens and closes doors” feeds fatalism.

    Is the phrase biblical? Of course. The metaphor is used several times in Scripture. And folks who come at life from a biblical perspective understand the metaphor.

    Is the phrase understood in our culture? Absolutely not. It is entirely misunderstood. Most people who come to church don’t look at life through the lens of biblical Christianity. So the metaphor often times means just to opposite of its intention! They hear, “if its easy it is an open door” and “if its hard or boring it must be a closed door.” I even hear it used with words like, “I guess it wasn’t meant to be.” “It was just bad luck, I guess.”

    How will I know if something is an open door, a closed door, or if I’m supposed to persevere, or be opportunistic?

    Since we’re not talking about a metaphor you will never know if a door is open or if a door is closed. What if the door is open but you face persecution or you have to persevere through a dry spell or an open door is really a temptation and not what God wants?

    That’s the problem with the phrase. It’s trying to describe something that you’ll never know in the moment.

    And it feeds into our apathetic culture.

    We confuse “open door” with “easy button.” And visa versa.

    This is what I do know

    We are called to the uncomfortable. We are called to love our neighbors as ourselves. We are called to be light in dark places. We are called to speak truth in love. We are called to be faithful with what we have. We are called to be living sacrifices. We are called to not just be hearers of the Word, but doers.

    We are not called to be 3rd party observers looking for open and closed doors.

  • Giving and Receiving at Church

    Photo by Vintage Collective via Flickr (Creative Commons)

    Confession: There are times when I am frustrated with my church.

    • To the point of not wanting to go.
    • To the point of wanting to give up on organized church.
    • To the point where I think the action of attending church may actually be hindering my ability to live out the Gospel in my life.
    • To the point of wanting to withhold myself, my money, my children, my thoughts, and even my prayers.

    This causes me to search myself, my motivations for the action of going to a church, and even what Scripture does or does not say about what goes on at church.

    Lately, at the bottom of that barrel I am left with this thought:

    Going to church is about giving and receiving simultaneously like the heart pumping blood in both directions. When I’m dissatisfied I am either unwilling to give of myself or I’m unwilling to receive ministry created for me (as part of the congregation). Conversely, I will be most satisfied with the corporate worship experience when I go with my heart pumping a desire to both give an receive.

    In other words, I think too much and I must be more simplistic in this exchange with the church. I need to discipline myself to give what I can (in its various forms, not exclusive to money) and receive what I can. (in its various forms, not exclusive to teaching)

    It’s a two-fold relationship. When I go more needy to receive I don’t go with a heart to give of myself. When I go needy to give of myself I don’t go with a heart to receive.

    Questions for Reflection

    I’m not accusing anyone of ever being dissatisfied with their church. I’m only confessing that sometimes I am. But if you find yourself discontent, here are some questions for reflection that have helped me.

    • What is the thing that drives you nuts, that has become a block between you “truly coming to worship God?“
    • What category would you place that thing in? Personal preference? Desire for excellence? Biblical accuracy? Effectiveness? Something else?
    • Is that really a big deal or do you just have an attitude problem?
    • Could you chose contentedness with that issue if it never changes?
    • Where areas are you contributing to your church?
    • If a leader thinks about you, would they label you as someone who contributes significantly to the vision and mission of the church? (Not just money, but your actions and heart for the congregation.)
    • Are  you comparing what you want with what you’ve seen at another church? Is that a fair comparison?
    • Is the root of your dissatisfaction a personal sin issue that is manifesting itself as dissatisfaction with something at church?
    • Are you seeking out relationships with people in your congregation or are you waiting for those relationships to pursue you?
    • Are you just being a jerk?

    This is what I know

    I know that Jesus expects us to live inter-dependently with a community of other believers. As I read the New Testament I never read about the early church being a place of comfort, cushy chairs, mono-cultural, or without tension. Instead, I see a church which gave of itself fully, which recognized that some people were mature while others were immature, was as functional and dysfunctional as a family, and was all about giving and receiving fully of themselves.

  • The Journey

    Sometimes we get hung up trying to be perfect.

    It’s not about achieving perfection.

    It’s about the journey of pursuing righteousness while already having been declared righteous.

  • The God of Discomfort

    God doesn’t call us to a life of comfort.

    As an overweight, gainfully employed, hyper-educated American Christian– that phrase convicts.

    Recently, when I spend time in God’s Word, the Holy Spirit has illuminated in me this truth in a brand new way. God doesn’t call us to live a comfortable life. He calls us to a radically life of discomfort.

    I tend to read my culture and my experience into the Bible so much… my life is pretty cushy. I tend to think that since I’m typically comfortable in life, the people God lifted up to me as examples must have lived equally comfortable lives, right?

    Wrong.

    On and on, the Bible is full of stories of people called to live uncomfortable lives. There are endless examples!

    When I hear people talk about what they like or dislike about their church it bothers me to hear so much talk of comfort.

    • We want music we are comfortable with.
    • We want to be around people like us, people who make us feel comfortable.
    • We want the preaching to challenge us, but never to make us uncomfortable.
    • We want a church with a great kids ministry so we can feel comfortable about leaving our children there.
    • We want comfortable seating.
    • We want to serve the church in ways that are convenient and comfortable for us.

    When I hear Christians (myself included) talk about the life we want to live, we all desire comfort!

    • We want jobs we are comfortable with.
    • We never want to be sick, that’d be uncomfortable.
    • We want comfortable shoes.
    • We want a comfortable bed.
    • We want a big, cushy Lazy-e-boy recliner to watch football.
    • We want to marry someone who is comfortable to be around, and our friends are comfortable with.
    • We want friends we are comfortable with.
    • When we think of vacation, we want things to be über comfortable!

    As I stare at my Bible this morning and ponder this, I’m left with this question:

    What if God is calling me to live a life of radical discomfort?

    What if following Jesus makes those around me uncomfortable?

    What if the church I’m called to be a part of never feels comfortable?

    What if steps of faithfulness lead me to great and greater steps of discomfort?

    What if my desire to be comfortable is leading me further away from Jesus instead of closer to Him?

  • Less studying, more doing

    The faith that Francis is talking about. This is the faith that will cause other people to look at you in horror and say, “That man is crazy enough to change this neighborhood.”

    Don’t know about you. But that message was a like a dart to the gonads for me.

    Stop talking, stop praying, stop studying. Do what you know you have to do.

    Today.

    ht to Terry Weaver for the link

  • Never be afraid to compliment

    I’ve noticed that many folks in ministry are cranky right now. No one seems to get along or agrees with anyone. (I had to say “many” because if I didn’t someone would get cranky about my use of generalization!) It’s all the rage to be a raging disagree-er.

    Exhaustion from the launch of the Fall season probably is impacting this back-biting time. The fact that the economy is feeling scary probably isn’t helping, either. The guilt of unconfessed sins. The weight of working for money instead of passion. Too many carbs and not enough sleep. Forgetting to put the seat down. You know, big stuff that weighs us down.

    Our tribe feels tired and cranky.

    I just want to share what I’ve been saying to myself lately. (Guilty as charged, your honor.)

    The world is already full of smart asses. I’d rather be known as an encourager than a smart ass. Something tells me my kids would be more proud of me for saying nice things about people instead of always trying to prove that I’m right or clever or funny or whatever.

    That’s why I’ve been trying to lean into the wisdom of my wife. She’ll give me the look and say, “No one cares if you are right if you’re a jerk.” The woman is a prophetess, I tell you.

    Prophe-tess.

    I’ve been reminded that I need to be more conscious of encouraging the people in my life. Even the 45 seconds it takes me to send a text to a friend make a big difference. It’s not much, but it’s something.

    As the recipient of some timely encouragement lately, let me say what everyone already knows.

    I can live a week on a compliment.