• Let’s Clarify our Relationship

    Dearest blog reader,

    It’s tough for me to write these words. Yet our affair is such that I think we need to clarify our relationship. It’s been pretty muddy as of late and I feel as though you are beginning to disdain me. And my ambivalence towards your disdain may not be helping matters.

    I write this blog. I invite you to read it. But it is important you know it was never about you. It’s about me. I don’t mean that to sound narcisistic, the way professors try to write off all social media as narcisism. See, I was blogging before we called it a blog. This thing you are reading started way back in high school– in journals. Then, in college, I got more sophisticated about it and would write this on my first Macintosh– in 1994. After that, I learned that my words could be more portable so I carried this around on Zip disks that I popped into computers all over the place… writing on the go! If you see the first post on this blog, from 5.5 years ago, you’ll see that it refers to other involvements online. (Seriously, I’ve been doing this online thing in one form or another since 1994!) It’s about me and my writing, not you and your reading.

    I consider my blog a form of art. I’m not that creative in the traditional manner, I can’t paint or draw. I suck at singing and dancing… this is what I have to work with. This is my studio.

    Long ago bloggers wrote in secret. (Think about the movies– how many of them are based off of journals found after a person dies?) I hid behind names I created for myself and never associated my name with what I posted online for fear that people would know what I was thinking in real life. The secrets weren’t because I was ashamed of what I wrote. It was because it was clear that I was keeping a journal and it was more for me than it was for you. I was fine with people reading it. I knew people read it. Back then it was more about the style of “hiding” than the hiding itself. Everyone did it.

    In the last 3-4 years styles changed and people went public about blogging. I’ve owned and blogged here at adammclane.com for almost 3 years. I was intentional about chosing this domain because I wanted to be transparent— I was tired of people whispering, “I found your blog, is it OK if I keep reading?”

    I don’t even blush anymore when you walk up to me and tell me you read about something on my blog. It’s just part of my life. Some people are strong verbal communicators– I like to think I am a stronger written communicator. It’s what I do and who I am. The fact is I love it when you walk up to me and say, “Are you Adam? I’ve read some stuff on your blog.” That’s great, it’s always fun. You’re welcome here. Please continue that. Please let me know how I can help you if you are learning to blog.

    What isn’t so great is when you put words in my mouth. Or when you steal my work. Or when you correctly quote me but misspell my name. Or when you take my ideas and thoughts and claim they are your own. Or when you want to take my ideas and make money for yourself. Or when you ask me to work for free. [There’s a whole rant to this one– for another day] Or when you blog/Facebook about my ideas negatively and don’t have the balls to at least send me a link to invite me into the same discussion that kicked off your rant with your friends. I could go on. But the point is made, right?

    This relationship is about trust. You trust me to write something worth reading. And I trust you to treat me with respect.

    – If you want to discuss something with me, I’ve given you 100 ways to contact me or leave a comment right here.

    – If you want to quote my blog, please spell my name correctly. (How do you get the link right and the name wrong?)

    – If you want to put a blog post on your website or in your denominations newsletter… please ask me for permission. I’ve never said no.

    – If you want to start a conversation about me, that’s totally fine… please allow me to defend myself.

    – If you want me to give you advice on how you can make money (or raise money for your ministry), don’t be annoyed when I ask for payment.

    I live a pretty open and public life. I’m totally fine with that. It goes with the territory. But living my life before you doesn’t mean I am open to being robbed, misquoted, mislabeled, and written off as some kind of jackass to be taken advantage of.

    I’m not angry, I’m not thinking of quitting, I’m not even a little bit ticked off— I just thought it was a good time to clarify our relationship. I live my life before you. I share my thoughts with you. I trust that you respect this relationship as much as I respect you. I invite your response. If I’m off base, let me know.

    Thanks for reading,

    Adam McLane

  • Thoughts on Disney on Ice Princess Classics

    Last night, our family went to go see the Disney on Ice show. It was great family fun. I remember when I was a kid wanting to go, the kid across the street always getting to go, but being disappointed that I never got to go. So I was a little surprised when Paul said he wanted to go because he is definitely not into princesses. In fact, we had a nice chat earlier about what kinds of wild animals it would be fun to release onto the ice to chase and eat the princesses.

    With all of that pessimism in me– it’s worth noting that we had a good time. No, really. It was fun.

    Some random thoughts.
    1. I’m glad we told the kids in advance we weren’t buying anything. It’s not that we’re cheap, it’s that we don’t want to blow money on $15 light up Disney princess spinning toys. And we ate dinner before going so no one needed a $12 Disney funnel cake. Overall, we got out of there with just paying for parking. I feel like somehow I earned $100 in bonus money.
    2. It has two acts. One was plenty. Seriously, we thought the thing was over. The kids were cheering. All of the dead princesses had been kissed by their princes and were back to life skating around in their costumed glory. It was over when they announced, “we’ll be back after this intermission for the second half of our show.” The second half ranked up there as the longest hour of my life.
    3. Now I know what happens to Olympic skaters after they reach puberty. They get jobs with Disney on Ice. I always said that skating didn’t prepare you for actual life skills, I was wrong.
    4. “Are those real men daddy?” Paul, sitting at the edge of his seat asked me this question when a troop of men in tights skated to the center of the ice rink. “It’s complicated son. Complicated.”
    5. Dress your kid like a princess, you spend $300 at Disney on Ice. Seriously, 75% of the little girls in the audience wore Disney dress-up clothes to the show. You could hear the vacuums from parents wallets as kids begged for matching kitsch.
    6. Big kids, too. Looking around, there were lots of kids who weren’t into in nearly as much as their parents. That’s the awesome part of Disney’s business model. Don’t introduce too many new characters– think about generations of kids who want to be Snow White, Belle, and Ariel when they grow up. There was a lot of sing-along from the parents. Reminds me of the McDonald’s business model. Hook ’em while they’re young!
    7. Megan was very satisfied. Like a lot of 8 year olds, Megan loves fantasy. She’s very interested in reading and stories. So this was right up her alley. She told me last night, “I just hope I can remember the order of all of these princesses for my journal.”
    8. Did you know you can watch streaming video from ustream.tv on your iPhone? I learned that last night during the second half of the show. I watched some puppy cams, kitten cams, and some strange show about people who want to pay to travel to space. No, they aren’t going to allow you to travel to space on your credit card. Pay cash up front. Makes sense.
    9. I have fun going places with my kids no matter what. Hey, I drag them to football games so putting up with 2 hours is no big deal, right? It was way easier than 2 hours of a princess birthday party.
    10. I love being a dad. There’s no other way to say that. It’s full of life lessons as I try my best to teach life lessons.

  • Why I prefer ecards during the holidays

  • Support Holistic Youth Ministry in San Diego

    kathy-phamI’m a part of a team at my church trying to figure out how to create a holistic youth ministry right here in San Diego. What exactly is a holistic youth ministry? Well, we don’t know just yet! But our vision is to architect a ministry that is good news to the urban working poor students in our neightborhood. We know that in our neighborhood we can just talk about good news, we have to bring good news to them. So our ministry will be teaching the Bible, aggressively sharing our faith, providing academic support, family services, and based on what we’ve heard from the first 3 weeks of our ministry… some sort of justice seeking mission. (Helping to right wrongs caused by oppressive situations, manipulative landlords, harsh government officials, and other fun things like that!)

    Obviously, I’ve got a full time job already. (As do the other 3 people volunteering) And getting something like this off the ground is a Herculian task. That’s why I’m stoked that our church has brought on Kathy Pham to lead this project that is crazy enough to change the world. She came here first as a summer mission intern– but we begged her to stay and transform those relationships with high school students into our launch of a youth minsitry.

    This idea was born just 6-7 weeks ago. We started with a handful of kids, no building, , no team, no concrete plan, and of course no money. So here we are: We’ve got a plan, a team, a building, a growing number of kids… and now we need some people to get behind Kathy so we can fulfill the fullness of what holistic youth ministry in San Diego can look like.

    Two ways to support:

    1. Support Kathy. Pure and simple. She’s the practitioner. We need someone out, on the ground, making this thing happen. She needs to raise $40,000 per year. And quick. [download id=”4″]

    Kathy has set up some times where you can meet her and here her presentation:
    October 18th: Vietnamese/English Presentation in Santa Ana, 6pm
    October 24th: English Presentation in Anaheim Hills, 6pm
    November 8th: English Presentation in City Heights, 6pm
    Any Day: English Presentation at wherever you would like to meet, any time:)

    2. Let us pick your brain. We’re looking to learn from others doing urban, holistic ministry. If you’re doing it… let me know. Our team is commited to learning from others.

  • My 3 Caddy Rules for Ministry

    caddy
    CC 2.0 jenni40947 via Flickr

    I’m a golfer. I’ve played the game off and on most of my life. More importantly, I love being around golfers.

    There is a joke among golfers that there are just three rules to a caddy’s job. “Just show up, keep up, and shut up.”

    That’s really how I feel about our burgeoning youth ministry. I’m just trying to show up, keep up, and shut up.

    Show up

    Let’s be real. As a volunteer that is 85%. I want to get there on time, be ready to join in whatever needs to be done, and be present emotionally.

    Keep up

    I’m learning. Tonight I came home feeling good because I felt like I learned a bunch of the kids names. I feel like I have a ton more to learn so that I feel like I’m actually contributing. I’ve got to keep up.

    Shut up

    The kids in our ministry could care less what I do for a living, how long I’ve been in ministry, or anything else. I just need to shut up and be there for them.

  • 2 Lies of Church Employment

    two-lies-of-church-employment

    Each week I encounter a new story of a church worker that angers me. These are stories from youth workers who have been wronged by the people they trusted with their lives… their church employer. Churches who fire them because they didn’t reach the right kids. Churches who fire a staff member because their spouse got pregnant. Churches who fire because a senior leader wants to hire a younger youth worker.

    If not for a deep love of God and His bride I don’t think these people could go on. Know right now that I have a deep love for the church. This is not an attack. This post acknowledges that there are churches who are good employers and bad employers. (There’s my first disclaimer)

    It sickens me that things routinely happen in the church, a place that represents Christ the king of Justice, that would be illegal in a business. It sickens me that I routinely encounter people who are wronged, been discriminated against, treated unfairly, not paid according to their contracts… and all of these people have a deep love for the church that just takes it.

    I want to share with you two lies of church employment. These are lies that are so commonly believe that it will shock you when I address them.

    1. The church is exempt from all employment laws. I’ve heard this lie so many times that I was SHOCKED to discover it is not true. A church is an employer in the United States. All employment is governed by the Department of Labor. There are very few places where the church is allowed to be exempt, your church better talk to a lawyer. But, in total, the church is not exempt from the basic provisions the government outlines. The biggest violations I see over and over involve the minimum wage laws. Unless you are a “professional” (e.g. ordained and/or certified somehow as a professional by an organization) your work is covered by the minimum wage law. So a church cannot tell you, “we’ll pay you the first 30 hours per week, but you are required to work 10 more as ministry hours.” If it is required, and you are hourly, they must pay you for that work time as well as overtime. Nor can a church have unpaid interns. Churches do this so often that you think its OK, it’s not. You can have all the volunteers you want. But if you call someone an intern and they have set work hours, you have to pay them. (Cash payment can be offset by living expenses, but its taxable income too!) This stuff goes on and on. The church, outside of “professionals” is not exempt from discrimination laws. (Age, sex, religious background, ethnicity, you know the routine) Nor can a church make your spouse and/or childrens attendance required as a term of your employment. Nor can they fire you because you are too old. Nor can they pass you over because of your gender or ethnicity. In short, the church is not exempt from federal employment laws in all areas! There is an assumption that the church can do whatever they want… they can’t.

    2. You can’t take legal action against a church when you are wronged. This is a cultural stigma, isn’t it?  In the last 5 years I’ve repeatedly encouraged those wronged [I term this “left for dead”] to hire an attorney and pursue legal action. I don’t know of a single case where a person did that. Why? The stigma of suing a church is so strong. People always toss out a Bible verse and say, “it’s wrong to sue Christians.” I would agree with you if that’s what the Bible actually said! If you think its wrong to ever sue a church or an individual, please go read 1 Corinthians 6:1-8 right now. Paul is not saying you can’t ever sue. He’s saying people within the church shouldn’t sue one another over trivial things.

    A family bankrupted and left for dead by their employer is hardly trivial! What about the pastor fired because the board wants someone younger? Not trivial. What about the salaried staff member who has wages garnished because he left 30 minutes early on a Sunday after putting in 60+ hours the rest of the week? Not trivial. What about the church worker who has a church completely violate his privacy and discloses medical information to the congregation? Not trivial! What about the church worker who has his contract changed whimsically by the board… he’s the youth pastor one day, the childrens pastor the next, and maybe not employed the third day. Trivial? These things are happening RIGHT NOW, like this week. Shouldn’t those people do something about it?

    Simply by working at a church these people have not given up their rights to be treated fairly. Our legal system provides avenues of correction for both employee and employer. We all know 99% of these cases would never make it to a trial, but church workers need to feel the freedom to protect themselves. And churches need to know that they can’t mistreat workers.

    When I hear these stories I know that most churches do what they do to their staff because they feel like they are exempt from employment laws and that no one will ever sue them. The sad reality is that nothing will change until we educate ourselves about our rights and make it known that church staff will take legal action against villanous churches who wrong workers.

    I smell a guest post from an employment lawyer coming. If you want exact information about a situation, please consult an attorney. Just so everyone realizes this… I’m not giving legal advice! (There’s my second disclaimer)

  • 3 Musketeers of Church Staff

    three-musketeersThere’s a lot of smack talk about church staffing these days. Senior pastors rightfully elevate the role of various staff members and do their best to put all staff on the same “level” as themselves in people’s eyes. There are even a few places where church leaders will acknowledge that the childrens ministry professional, youth worker, and music minister are equally valuable. Within the non-denomination world this is emerging as a style of government where the paid staff are the elders.

    All for one and one for all: Brilliant. Biblical. Awesome.

    I agree with the premise. As a person sitting in the pews my family is ministered by all staff pretty much equally. Certainly, there is headship and we acknowledge that one of the staff is “in charge.” But that is really just a role, isn’t it? It’s not that being the leader is necessarily harder or more important. It’s a different role, equally important and dependent to the others. And in many cases each person on staff has an equal level of education while each chose a slightly different career path. So the education argument seems to prove that most staff is equal. Another argument is that the preacher should  get more money than the rest of the staff. Really? As if the stuff taught to the kids and teens isn’t as important as what’s preached? This merely shows the ignorance in the process of how churches work on a week-to-week basis. As someone who has done a lot of roles on church staff I can tell you that there is nothing more or less difficult about preparing a sermon. In fact, its a lot easier than preparing curriculum for 5-6 age levels. So, again, the argument that somehow the person preaching is more valuable to the church organization falls apart. The day-to-day reality is that all of the church staffing roles are equally important.

    Don’t believe me? Watch your senior pastors face when you tell him the chidlrens worker or worship leader are AWOL on a Sunday morning.

    The real question is… when will that be reflected on pay day?

    If church staff are equally valuable to the organization why is there inequality when it comes to taking care of staff? Why does the senior pastor make 2-3 times what the childrens worker makes? Why does that person get perks not available to the rest? Why does that person get more time off? Sabbatical? Conference budget? Book budget? Car allowance? Special tax perks. It may shock you to know that most associate level staff makes less than half what the senior pastor makes… before the perks kick in.

    This gets really strange when staff have kids the same age. The staff all have equally important roles but can’t afford to live in the same neighborhood. One family sends their kids to private school, goes on lavish vacations, and never have to worry about their kids getting new clothes. The rest of the staff live paycheck to paycheck. They watch Extreme Makeover: Home Edition and wonder when someone will turn in their house?

    I’d like to ask you to consider a new way. What if every pastoral team member made the exact same amount of money? (Perks and all.) What if they weren’t just equal in importance, recognized 1-2 times per year, but were recognized in the one way that would keep those associate level people in the game for life?

    Want to attract talent? Pay them. Want to keep staff? Pay them. Want to change a community by having talented people in place for a generation? Pay them.

    All for one and one for all. Brilliant. Biblical. Awesome.

  • Sell Your Church Reach Your Community

    sell-your-church

    Permit this heresy: There is no mention of a church owning a building in the New Testement. I’m not saying it’s unbiblical to own a church building, I just think its worth it is worth thinking about.

    What would church look like with no building? How would programs change? How would staffing change? How would worship services change? How would staff meetings change?

    How would church finances change? How much more mission could you do without building maintanence? Without a mortgage? Without property insurance? How much less stuff would you buy, in general if you had to store it at your house?

    How would your community change? If it changed the zoning of church property to commerical or residential? If that space became a public park? If that building became used as a community center?

    I’m not saying that churches shouldn’t have buildings. I’m just saying that for some congregations the benefit of having property is not outweighed by the negative impact on the congregations mission and finances.

  • Social Media Tip: Be Consistent

    social-media-tip-consistent

    Want to know a secret about social media success?

    If you want to succeed long-term in social media you need to be consistent in how you use social media. For more than 10 years I’ve been active in some form of what we now call “social media.” Chat rooms. Message boards. Listserv. Forums. MySpace. Blogs. Facebook. Twitter. I’ve seen fads come and go. I’ve seen rock stars emerge and fade. I’ve seen high profile people take interest and then lose interest. Social media is a bit of a revolving door. Something gets popular, attracts the masses, people get bored, someone invents something better, the hype begins again.

    But yet there has always been this thread of people that has remained consistent throughout. There’s a lot to learn from these people if you want to be successful.

    Some of us have just chugged away. We’ve never gotten uber popular. We’ll never leverage what we have to make a fool of ourselves like @aplusk did on Twitter. But in the meantime, we’ve utilized these tools to meet people, share ideas, and establish ourselves along the way.

    The best way to succeed is to be consistent like Warren Buffet and not up and down like Donald Trump. Stick with winners. Be consistent. Be disciplined.

    What does consistency look like for social media?

    – Make yourself consistent by using the same handle. (social media name on a web platform)

    – Use the tool the same way, most times. (maintain your blog post consistency, tweet frequency, use Facebook in predictable ways)

    – stick to your genre. (totally OK to expand your horizons. but don’t be so general that no one cares. if you’re a mom blog, don’t post gadget tips for work. if you’re a gadget blogger, no one cares about your kids soccer game.)

    – don’t be a jerk. (unless your online persona is one of jerkiness. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve met people in real life and thought… they were so much cooler on their blog.)

  • Win a Google Wave Invite

    Win a Google Wave Invite

    Tonight the Google gods waved their magic wand and granted my wish by inviting me to the first group of beta testers for Google Wave. (See the video above.) Included in my account was the ability to invite a few people.

    I have to be honest, I don’t see what all of the hype is about. Then again, that’s what I said about Twitter 2 years ago! I unwittingly posted a jab at Kristen that I had invites to give away and all of a sudden I was flooded with requests for an invite! Having no ability to chose, this is my attempt to give away some things while celebrating what I’m all about. Did you see people were selling invites on Ebay? Crazy!

    Two Ways To Win an Invite

    Contest 1: (one invite) Simply leave a comment on this post with a valid Google account email in the email field. Say whatever you want in the comment box. From this group of people I’ll pick one random person to get an invite using Random.org.

    Contest 2: (one invite) Write a blog post or Facebook note about what you are doing to change your community for the better. Tell me how you volunteer at a community center, work with a local church, raise money for a good cause, or spend your weekends hand feeding endangered turtles. Then post the link here on my blog. (Either as a trackback or as a comment.) I will read them all and pick my favorite to get the invite. It’s not as democratic as the first contest but this part reflects who I am and what I’m all about.

    Contest Deadline is Thursday, October 1st at 7:00 PM Pacific Time

    Who is eligible? Anyone who enters. Feel free to share this link. One entry per person. I’ll delete multiple entries and remove you from my Christmas list. You realize that this blog logs IP addresses, right?

    OK, 1-2-3 Go!

    Update:

    Contest #1 Congrats to Bet. She was the random comment chosen for contest #1. Bet, I submitted your invite already. It can take a day or so for Google to actually approve you.

    Contest #2 Congrats to Justin. His post is about picking up some random kids traveling through town and offering them a weekends worth of hospitality. Great story!