Did you ever notice Charles Stanley has a really long index finger? I was thinking about that today. Google it and let me know what you think. Murray had to go to the vet today to get a prescription refilled. He did great. They told me they couldn’t take his temperature because he wouldn’t let […]

Is this a cruel joke? Are you all having fun and living life and just convinced those around me to participate in a grand ruse? A few months ago I had Jackson convinced that he was the star of Jackson TV, a 24/7/365 TV show about his life. Sadly I think both are false. Today […]

So let me get this straight. By mid-April the government is sending us all $1200? But today they announced we are supposed to stay locked up in our homes until the end of April? People are going to lose their minds! And I’m here for it. All of it. We’ve gone from watching reality shows […]

Oooo… we’re halfway the-ere. Woo ohhh. Livin’ on a prayer. Thank you 90s hottie. 15 days down, 15 to go? I hope so. The news on this virus was terrible today. Terrifying really. NY is a week ahead of us. Good Lord it could be bad here. Meanwhile in Rolando we can’t manage to keep […]

Tonight I thought it would be fun to go to CVS Pharmacy to walk around and feel normal. It wasn’t fun. I don’t recommend it. Today was Monday. Every day kind of feels like Monday. Or Saturday. Who cares anymore. I get up at my normal time each day, try to maintain some sort of […]

We went to Costco today. We got hot dogs and they were delicious. Burping up hot dog breath in the car with the windows up, not hot but worth it. We also went to Smart & Final where we did not touch people. When the cashier guy handed me the receipt our hands almost touched. […]

Stardate 73700.6Thirteenth day of social distancing  I don’t care about coronavirus anymore. Just please make it stop raining. RIP to Spring Break 2020. We never knew you. Our kids have this idea that kind of makes sense to me. What if all of society just agreed that Monday is January 1st, 2020? What if we […]

We did it, America. We figured out how to get the news to shut up about the election. And we’ve solved school shootings for the year. And we’ve ended homeschool jokes once and for all. And we’ve nearly solved carbon emissions. No one is complaining about bike lanes anymore. All we had to do was […]

Megan had a good point tonight. If COVID-19 doesn’t get us, diabetes might. We really need to slow down on the desserts. Have you seen your inbox? I had no idea all these companies cared so much about me. My health insurance company just sent me an email that said, “We’re in this together for […]